What to do? What to do? Well, the first thing to do is to explain the creepy dreams I had this weekend -- all stemming from the decision I made on Friday to quit my job as a customer service representative for an independent Farmers Insurance agent in Edmond, Oklahoma. The only reason I even considered working again, outside the house, and outside of writing, is because of the pledged revenue I lost over the summer and late spring. It wasn't coming in, there didn't look like another way to make ends meet, and even though that situation turned out, I was on the hook working for a man who really wasn't quite ready to be a manager or a boss.
When I quit Friday, and made it official Saturday, I began having a few strange but creative dreams all reflecting my decision, my feelings, my inhibitions of being on my own again fully - but I have been on my own for years. I know where my feet are, and through prayer and work I always land on them. Sometimes the impact hurts, but I do land well enough. The first dreams I had revealed snakes, two of them, yellow, one bigger than the other, and the larger one was coming after me. I picked up Faith (my dog) and I ran from it. My daughter Laura, who has never been afraid of any snake, picked up the yellow snake and she scolded it. Go Laura! Go Laura! It began spitting venom out of it's fangs, but not at anything, just out and everywhere. The poison didn't hit anyone or anything important.
The 2nd yellow snake wasn't scary at all, but in the path. He was OK, shorter, friendly, and just there. He wasn't trying to attack, he wasn't trying to do anything. Just there. I let him pass by and I continued talking to Laura about the first one. Thanking her for picking it up....she said I was welcome, she loved me, and that was that. So, I went online and found the meaning. The first ugly mean snake was my former connection to Corporate America. Strong, forceful, spitting, and making all sorts of scary sounds. It was controlling, and it was selfish, wanting to be the ONLY one, and it was doing its best to attack me. I was saved by a girl that loved me. She spoke directly to it, and told it I was not for hire. I loved that. The 2nd snake, a more gentle creature was my future employment. Fatter, thicker, more content, and just a happy easy-going little guy - writer...authorship!
Last night I dreamed of tornadoes! Oh, the wind! I could see from my very high rise apartment that the wind was on NW Expressway going west. That's the direction and the area of the city where I grew up. I was absolutely spared and safe from all the harm the wind was doing. I was completely OK. It was twisting and disrupting everything, but not me. All the changes were being made to the past, all the changes were being made in my heart, not my future, not my desires to be me. I have overcome them, I have gotten past them, very high up in the air above the scene, so that what I see is gone already - I just need to let it go. So today is my first real day of freedom.
What big plans do you think I have? I think I'll clean my apartment, pop out the vacuum (new machine! can't wait) and just clean. Prepare the new me. Just get it all lined out...and of course drive to Starbucks in the middle of the day, and just sit down for as long as I want to, and drink a quad-shot cappuccino while I read a book!
Viva la Freedom! There are several dream analysis sites online. I use about 4 of them to make the best determinations about my dreams. Because each of us experiences life differently, it is best to ask yourself very direct questions while making the interpretations. Never assume the site master is always correct. They are YOUR dreams.