Thursday, January 27, 2011

A Ravenclaw Among Griffendors

For the longest time I thought Caity was with me in the House of Ravenclaw, but after thinking about it, she's just another Griffendor. Truth be told, she is one of the smarter LIONS out there, but she is still one of THEM. LOL

My own parents would fall into the House of Hufflepuff; mom with her painting, green thumbness, and desire to make everyone happy -- and dad, who I think had too much compassion to fish, would have spent another four years on that ship in Korea rather than being asked or required to shoot someone for any reason. Don't get me wrong, when backed into a corner the man would fight like hell, but since Pop is more or less known for walking and talking in circles, that just doesn't happen very often at all.

What did we do before J.K. Rowlings put us all in Houses? I'm amazed really, because she nailed it. There are 4 types of people out there -- me, I'm a Ravenclaw. What I'm doing in a house full of egomaniac, strong-spirited, combative, sporty types, I have no idea. Those of us who are more intellectual, more apt to run than fight, more apt to write about it -- we get it. There isn't a one of us that would FIRST pick up the knife to fight; there simply has to be a sensible way to negotiate peace, right? Well, that's me...I'm a peacemaking, peace-loving, peace-hoping, peace-wanting, peace-finding person, WHO happens to live among a bunch of fist-clinching, grab-a-weapon-now people, who stand on couches with remotes in their hands screaming at each other as they blast their opponents to hell with their thumbs!

Ravenclaw! RAVENCLAW!!! (Where are my headphones?)

If I had to think about it further, and I do, Laura was born a Hufflepuff, perhaps even raised as one, but after a while even she became a warrior type princess. She much more prefers to fight, kick, kill, and die for the cause, over and over again on her anime games and sites. I think she has 15 avatars....shamefully I admit, I don't have an avatar. I'm secretly afraid to make one. I think it will come to life and start running my life somehow. What if it doesn't think like me, but wants to take over the world or something? Can we really control an avatar once it's out there? Reuben - - oh my son Reuben....GRIFFENDOR....conceived, born, raised, will certainly die a full fledged 100% warrior-soldier - - no doubt. I think he was whispering battle cadences inside of me. Pretty sure of it. No chance he'll change houses EVER. Even Brandon, Caity's boyfriend, my new son, he's a freaking Griffendor! He's more of a follower, but he has great ideas, bright happy attitude, and he's there, a good friend always in the corner, just waiting for his chance to shine, and he does. He's perfect for my little girl.

FINE! Good thing we Ravenclaws have WINGS...at least I can fly up to the corner of the ceiling and think about pooping on them when it gets crazy. LOL I will survive. I am the MOM.....hahaha..I WIN. One point Ravenclaw!!

Sex and the City of Celebacy!

Hahaaha....so, since I'm the blogger does that make me Carrie? I actually met Cindy Nixon once when I went to NYC with my dog. Cindy actually walked across traffic where SHE was causing a crowd to gather, and came over to kiss Faith. She's almost too thin in person, but on television looks about right. Makes me think not only how not thin I look on television, but how scary it must be for actors to feel that they have to maintain ridiculous figures to be loved from their always-looking-for-them-in-public-to-see-if-they-really-look-like-that-in-person audience. Cindy was very sweet, and Faith adored her shoes...she told me later.

This March, (and not that I'm counting), will mark the 12th anniversary of my decision not to be sexually active. I can think of better anniversary titles; but not one of them hits me in the face quite as abruptly. I mean, this morning I woke up and realized that because of the flu symptoms I've been fighting for over a week now, I've not had any coffee to drink....save one good sip that reminded me why I wasn't drinking coffee until I'm better. Being caffeineless is a lot different than being without a man....I really don't think I'm going to wait on the right cup of Joe to come around; and EVEN if I had to wait, if I was FORCED to wait on the right cup of JOE to bring me to myself again, I'd only have to go as far as the nearest Starbucks.

That's it! We knew it all along, it was in the back of minds! MEN can be manufactured to specifications and then poured out and served correctly if we so desire. NO NO NO...do not wake me up, I'm thoroughly enjoying this fantasy. If I want to equate men with coffee, it wouldn't be the first time. I remember once in Seattle, when I hadn't been thinking much about anything else but the fact that I was still not having sex, and someone from behind the counter asked me and asked me if I preferred a tall, hot, robust Italian or Pike's Place. I almost answered that I'd meet the man outback; then realized he was offering me choices of coffee flavors that were brewing that morning....still, I think I get points for a quick mind.

It's really not as bad as people think. I don't really REGRET the decision, it's just gone on so long that when or if Mr. Forever comes along and I try to go in reverse I'm just wondering if the gears will need to be replaced for lack of action or if they'll break from pressure. You can only imagine the thoughts that run through my head as Valentine's Day approaches. I think to myself, SOMEONE has to be sane and not have sex, so that the whole world doesn't spin and roll off it's axis! I'm just so proud to be called upon AGAIN to save the freakin' planet from RUIN! Brave, brave solider...LOL

Oh, I didn't tell you WHY I decided to be without men, without sex, without all the headaches attached to both -- it's a good story. I had kids ages 13, 9, and 8 and knew that they needed me and they certainly didn't need me bringing a man, or men, into their lives making manly-fatherly decisions, or statements to them, about me, about them, about us. We were in the middle of a bad ugly divorce, custody battle, then I won custody, and it just seemed that the word "MAN" was associated with everything that I had been fighting. It might not be realistic to think that all men were the enemy, but it was helpful in continuing my decision and keeping the promise to myself that I could make it on my own - - at least until my heart had given into a different way of thinking.

Well -- it's been 12 years. Will it be a Baker's Dozen before I find the ONE? Is there a ONE? I want to think so. I mean, I want to think that there's this guy -- a tall, curly haired, light eyed man, with a shy and quirky smile, maybe he's from back East, and he's been thinking about me for say.....29 years. LOL....leave me alone, I told you I haven't had any coffee in 6 days. I'm dying; I know I am. If I don't get to the roast soon I'll shrivel up....they'll find me in a corner wide-eyed and drooling which wouldn't be all that embarrassing, not as long as they don't take pictures and post them. What is it that I'm hoping to find this year in terms of the right MAN anyway? Is it necessary? Probably not, but the ONE thing about the ONE is that I don't need any help finding him. Infact, I would reject help finding him.

Believe it or not I get upset when a man starts off a chatty little small talk conversation with me. If you could see through the air-invisibles you would see horns sprouting all over me, red-flags flying all around, and air-horns blaring out the sound of "BACK OFF! BACK OFF! SHE'S ABOUT TO EXPLODE". It's not that I'm a shrew, nope, far from it, but I am just a Scorpio woman who absolutely chooses the man, it's never going to change, never ever ever never, and there's no reason for anyone to KNOW that....so I don't attack them if they sweetly, or gentlemanly approach; I simply smile and make some excuse to walk away. Sometimes I wish I was an Aries (but that only lasts about a second!) LOL

Friday, January 14, 2011

Pardon Me If I Don't FEEL Old

So, it's what, a little after 1:00 in the morning, and I'm still cranking the volume up a bit louder than my mom says is healthy for my ears. I take in consideration that I probably lost most of my youth-hearing in the 80's during the more than 300 concerts I went to. I worked for Concerts West, it was my JOB to go...I showed up early, I stayed late. I enjoyed my job. What can I say?

Tonight, well it's Friday. I'm dancing and dancing, and just really moving, not doing too much. I mean, I don't wear the big-hair wigs anymore and sing out loud into the curling iron, those days are gone. I say they're gone, my daughter hid my curling iron; says it's not good for my OLD hair. HA! I laugh at her 21-ness. She can have the gorgeous locks, I don't care. I'm dancing, right? That's right. I'm dancing. YES, it is true, I have a Mueller knee brace supporting my right knee cap, but only because I don't want it buckling on me in the middle of a great Van Halen song, and stopping me from jumping off the bed and...oh, OK, that was a lie. I do manage to keep my feet on the floor most of the time now, but I can dream!

I got my new little 16gb iPod the other day and filled it up with 4000 songs -- I didn't know I have that many, but YES I did. The good news is I like the sound the needle makes on the vinyl as it scratches, so I played "Going Down for the Last Time" by Head East on the turntable, recorded it, then converted it to an Mp3 and now I can hear it the way they intended you to hear it -- SCRATCHY! ROTFLMAO...can I say that in a blog? Sure I can, I'm dancing! LOL

If the kids come into my room and catch me, then hell they catch me. They'd also better be prepared to join me, because even though they can't hear .38 Special riffing guitars and blasting out their Southern Comfort, they can at least interpret what they see me doing as being lots of fun, joyful, and it's motivating. Laura was hilarious, I walked by her earlier this evening while she was on her webcam explaining my actions to her boring dork nerd friends on an anime 2nd life game -- and she thinks I'm crazy! They stared at me....open mouthed, just sat there in their chairs eating potato chips and stale pizza rolls....I'm dancing!!! "Put on a little Dylan" HOOTIE!!! HOOTIE!!! That's right, I'm not feeling that old tonight. I just feel like dragging the yellow dog out from under the bed and making her do a two-step. Ever see a yellow armless dog dance? Well, she's awesome at it, she doesn't care if I look and act like a fool -- she's into me! She loves me! I'm her best friend.

Hey, what's that? Can't hear you! Can't HEAR YOU...sorry, nope, not now either, sorry, something about going to bed? I don't think so! No now, I'm hungry! LOL What I really think is awesome about my kids thinking I'm too old to stay up late and kicking back with my Credence, Bread, Bee Gees, Billy Joel, and Journey -- the best part, is they don't know what I know about these bands. They weren't there! They WERE NOT THERE -- I was, and this isn't a dance-fest, it's a TIME MACHINE! (I'm 17)

Be blessed!!

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

New Beginnings for 2011

Can't believe it's been this long since I last wrote. I'm going to have to change the name of the blog to "Whenever Jude Gets Around to Writing it Blog!" Wow. Thanks for your patience.

Since the last post I've been with family for the holidays. My son Reuben came up to Indiana, where we are living now, and he had himself a heck of a time. We were concerned whether or not we would be able to show him a good time because a client of mine didn't get around to paying me, and it set me back -- not like Bernie Cornfeld, the Overseas Investments guy was set back in the 70's when he lost over $30,000,000 or even like Bernie Madoff has been set back -- but still not being paid the $5000 owed to me meant a number of things couldn't happen. Things like rent! LOL

Well, God is big right? He's GIGANTIC infact, and Reuben came up this way expecting to be happy and he was. He had a lot to think about when he got back to Oklahoma. Eventually he's thinking of moving here and opening up a fitness center. He's planning on finishing at least one more year of college in Oklahoma, then completing his studies at IUPUI (Indiana University Purdue University at Indianapolis) There's a reason they use initials...wow...that's a long name. If they had class rings and had to put that on the top it would weigh too much on a person's finger, possibly causing an accident.

Since we last spoke and/or you read what was happening in my life, I have met a great man named Derek Britt. Now, now, don't be thinking that I'm thinking that -- nope, his body, and his heart are taken! But I can still use his mind and connections. Derek is going to become my new production partner. He's going to write the children's books for me about Faith's life. His beautiful girlfriend Silvia is going to illustrate them. Derek is going to lead the production on the film about Faith, take my memoir to the right publishers, and just be the hero I need! (Put that in a bottle and you don't need gunpowder!)

Laura and Caity are getting to the point of realizing that an education could do them some good. When the Fall semester rolls around all three children should be attending some college somewhere. Caity is having a baby in May or late April, so she may decide to go online. Laura will no doubt put in a few classes at the local junior college and then transfer over to IUPUI as well. She and Caity are interested in Business, but I know Laura will attack the animal world of science as well. Caity may pick up a class on pottery, she's really very (amazingly) good at it. Caity use to do my homework for me in 1998 when I went to Oklahoma City Community College and she was only 8. She's good.

Animals are fine, friends are good. I'll write more tomorrow so you'll be able to feel like you're reading an almost daily blog - - something about that just makes me feel great. I'm writing again. I'm talking and I'm walking, and I'm working...now, someone please...pay me!!