Sunday, July 13, 2008

My Best Friends Love Me


Prune Juice (Sun Sweet Pictured) and The Balance Ball (This one Giam)

I have to say that my butt gets so much of my attention that I really have to ask myself why I'm so biased toward it. I think I should be giving my stomach equal time, and in some ways I am; after all the prune juice I'm drinking is actually causing the belly to decrease but my belly and my bum have an agreement that the waste which is being attracted and called down by the prune juice will actually exit me through the other side...thank God, He's the designer not I.

I have been using the balance ball (mine is silver and made by Reebok) for a chair now rather than using a computer chair. Something I saw in a magazine I think really, but the picture of the ball on those glossy pages was actually a part of a chair, it sat up a little higher - no problem, I just lowered my keyboard. I bounce and roll, sitting a bit off balanced and "unstable" at all times gives me the edge in my exercise program - - I like to throw that in, I like to say that I have an exercise program. It makes me sound like I have all the kinks worked out, and that maybe I have a really good plan to get rid of all this flab while working on my lazier muscle groups. I guess I do, I mean I have a personal trainer at the tips of my fingers when I pick up the phone and call him. I just don't employ him. Truth is my personal trainer employs me! He's Ryan of Annie Pooch Pops and he and his partner Brian are going to be working with me and Faith on the boxes I've shown you in other's that for backward thinking? My personal trainer is available by phone and he pays me! I like that arrangement. Now, if I can just get the butt to cooperate a little faster.

Being from Oklahoma I have always been around horses so sitting on the ball as long as I do makes a lot of sense that way too. I can actually straddle the thing and pretend it's Rebel, shorter of course, a little thinner even, but I can grip him (it) nicely and ride well enough like I used to - imagining of course a trail or two, perhaps a race track if I'm not typing. I've taken to riding the ball when I'm watching television and notice that I stop or slow down just before someone gets hacked or murdered to death. Commercials are nice I time myself and see how fast and how far I can go on my imaginary pony....pretty soon I'll be ready for the Kentucky Derby, me and my thighs too, yes, my thighs are really enjoying this new chair they're not talking to each other nearly as much as they used to.

My son broke his ankle this past winter and when he wrote to his friends at church he explained that "I knew there was a problem when my ankle met my shin for the first time. Although they had actually known of each other for 21 years or more, they had never properly met - they should not have." I think of my thighs in the very same way - mirrored sisters perhaps, not kissing cousins! I don't need that, I don't want that, but speaking of mirrors, I am actually looking forward to the times I catch myself looking at my backside - right now I only glimpse...looking forward to the day I stand there and just love what I see...maybe take myself out on a date I look so hot!

The future is there, the juice is working it's best to help me too. I make my own trail mix, and it rotates often from heavier on the raisins to heavier on the almonds, but there are always nuts, fruits, oats, and chocolate chips in the mix - much like the juices I blend. I can get a bag of carrots, quart of blueberries, six or seven pears, plums, peaches, and/or apples, but there's always going to be a little prune juice and a little Aloe Vera juice in the canister waiting on the remains to be blended in - it's just the way it is. Friends talked me into buying a Rubbermaid BLUE pitcher so they didn't have to see the browny/purple/orange mix in the refrigerator every time they came over and opened it - stay out!

My friends search my frig for the strangest things too; they can't find beef, chicken, cakes, milk, white eggs, bacon, anything really other than loads of vegetables, fruits, jams I just made or curds I bought for the peanut butter I just made...I'm sick I know. I use sesame oil rather than peanut oil, and I use avocado oil rather than corn oil - olive oil is used for salad dressing and oh yes, you'll find six different varieties of olives in the frig, and probably a dozen types of cheese - and wine. If it has fiber in it you can find it in my cupboard - if it doesn't...go to the store and buy it for yourself. The change I made a few months ago is real and its for life, not a day, not a month, not until I get thin, it's who I am and how I eat - and you know what - it hasn't made me any more sane than I wasn't in the first place, but I feel better and I hung the mirror up just in anticipation of the day I stop in front of it.

My best friends love me. They hope the best for me, they know they have a battle to win, a war in fact, one that has been going on for years and years - you can't expect immediate change to take place, but the more troops you use, the more planning and diligent attention given to the details as well as the maintaining of the plans and diligent work - the better the odds. I don't mind gambling a little, not when I'm the prize!

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