Sunday, April 29, 2007

National Keynote Speaker Seeks Employment!

Couldnt' hurt! I'll just post here on the blog that I'm out there looking for a place to talk - who knows, maybe someone needing a keynote speaker will Google the words "keynote speaker" and hey - come up with me! Yes, that could happen. So, you've found me. You're thinking - yes, we really need a keynote speaker - one who will be diversified enough to fulfill our every need. Oh, but where to look - where do you find someone who, at the turn of a second hand, will drop whatever it is that he or she is doing - jump on a jet and come to our banquet? Where on earth do I find someone with JUST enough humor, JUST enough wit - someone who dresses well, carries themselves with ease, has an eye on the world's current events - and Oh, if she/he would only be inexpensive that would be best --where!

HELLO!! I'm standing right here, you can't see it, because I'm outside of the computer today. I'm not nesting inside the internal guts of the machine this week - no, I'm somewhere between jobs, floating anywhere between Oklahoma, Texas, Florida, Louisiana, California and New York. I'm out there looking for you! I promise to be entertaining, not too controversial, I won't jump on your furniture - but I will make you smile. My agent thinks I'm hilarious because so far he hasn't had to actually book me - I don't stop looking for work long enough to let him do his job. Just so afraid he won't find me something, so I'm poundin the keyboard looking - searching - looking - BEGGING actually. I want to work - it's that inexpensive thing, kills me! I do find that it helps the hosts out though!

So, you're hoping to find someone with enough energy to kick the day off, and finish it out. You're looking for someone who knows the difference between Bull Run and the Second Attack? Oh, so you're looking for someone with compassion, passion, heart, desire, determination, motivation, strength, and UMPH? OH, pick me! Pick ME!! Please, over here...see me now? Yes, hello, how are you, I'm Jude Stringfellow - keynote speaker, professor of English, poety, author - you know, all around know-it-much, and just think - I come with my own dog! Not just any dog mind you, no, she's a celebrity dog, a happy in-your-face smiling mutt with all the stamina you were looking for! YES...why yes, we'd love to come to your town....when? Now? YES! Thank you.

Whatever your topic, as long as its something I have some knowledge of, or something I could learn while flying to you - albeit - probably needs to be relatively close to my personal views, mind you - no one needs a liar or a cheat - just an honest, hard working, upbeat, unique and unusual speaker with glee in my voice, a spring in my step - and here's another little secret; I'm still trying to lose weight, so you don't have spring for dessert! No, just a paycheck, and a couple of Starbucks will do. Faith's manager has a small stipulation, we have to fly with her in the cabin, and she must be in a good,clean pet friendly hotel - at the end of the day, she's still a dog!

Thank you for looking, thank you for thinking of us...we can't wait to meet you! LOL - smiling, can't wait to tell Mom she'll be employed again!

Agent: Mike Maguire: (571) 215-1147

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