Sunday, April 20, 2008

Dreaming of Ladders and Being Barefoot

You know you'll sense the meaning of this dream the instant that I tell it to you. You won't have a problem whatsoever figuring it out - - and that's a good thing. You're becoming the great dream interpreter (like me), and that can be handy at the office. People will begin to respect you, fear you, laugh in your face - but they will do something.

I was in a building, a big, pretty brick condo or apartment building and I was in downtown Manhattan, probably around the Tribeca area, something flashy, something solid. I was walking outside the building using the revolving door, and I noticed that I wasn't wearing any shoes. That didn't seem to be a problem for me, it was almost as if it was a blessing. I COULD walk around NYC without shoes; I think that was the important part of the first act in this dream. My dreams have several connections to stage performances. I usually dream in color, I always dream in detail, and there are words in my dream too. Sometimes the words are written and sometimes they are just spoken out loud. I love it when that happens. I can try to read the signs of whatever it is my subconscious is trying to tell my heart.

Act Two: I'm going back into the building (perhaps to get my shoes) when the elevator isn't where it used to be. I'm asked to use the stairs. I live on the 8th floor, but decide what-the-heck, a little exercise is good for the body right? So off I go, but I'm not using stairs I'm using ladders. At first the ladder is plastic, then wooden. I think that means I go from the temporary to the permanent. Anyway, I'm climbing the 3rd ladder when I see 2 little girls climbing in front of me. One is older than the other and they are cute together, just sisters being sisters. They are talking to each other and carrying dolls in one of their hands while using their other hand to hold onto the ladder. I pick the smallest one up and I take her up the ladder with me as if she is my little doll. (Gotta be Caity, I see that she has her doll in her left hand.)

Act Three: I'm in my apartment or condo now, and I'm not with the little girls. I'm standing in my new yellow sports bra and showing off my rock hard abs...and my giant gallbladder scar. My sweat pants are orange and change colors as I walk. I'm sitting on the bed talking on the phone, clicking the remote, and watching something about nature all the while putting on my left shoe. Can we say "multi-tasking"? I woke up with a satisfied sleep, a good rest, and a great outlook for the day. I knew straight up that the building was solid, it was brick, it was big, it was strong, it was steady. That's ME! I'm thinking of myself in those terms. Buildings are often a way that we reflect upon ourselves and how we feel about ourselves. There was construction going on outside the building - and I'm working out nowadays! Making my structure fit my expectations.

The real meaning behind the bare feet is simply this: Freedom. I know I have time to waste right now. I'm working on my body, I'm working on my 4th book. I'm relaxed, not traveling for 3 weeks, just putting my time into me. The ladders are great too! They symbolize climbing or achievement. They're always good, never risky, never unstable, and they show a willingness to work on my own issues myself rather than expecting them to be handled for me. The little girls are most obviously my own little girls, and I do pick Caity up a lot in terms of support and love more so than I do Laura right now because Laura is actually employed. Laura was in the lead, and she had her little doll secured while Caity was about to lose grip on her doll. I had to pick her and her doll up for a few of the steps.

The girls weren't with me in my apartment and they don't live with me now either. I am on my own. I do multi-task, and I do have a yellow sports bra! My scar showing is just as important because it means I don't mind the world knowing I have flaws and that I've been hurt but have survived. That's so me. I want the world to see it. I think that even after I get my bomb-body, the one you never thought you'd have again, that I'll get a two-piece swimsuit or wear my sports bra with low-rise sweats and let the scar be seen. It's ugly sure, but it's beautiful too. It holds so much power and strength for me. It screams "I made it".

A good dream I think.

1 comment:

deirdre g said...

You are right, that is a good dream.

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