Been There, Done That.

 My daughter Laura and I own horses, the other kids don't really get into them, but Laura and I have been most of her life - - which as you may have guessed, is a really long time. My kids are so old, it's really sad how they've gotten out on their own and don't truly need Mom anymore. I keep Laura around for the simple fact that I don't want to ride by myself, feed animals by myself, train by myself, or just overall hang out with people I don't already know; been there, done that, it wasn't fun.  A lot of times when you have horses you'll see one for sale or someone wanting to buy one, and the language they have in the advert will say they're looking for a "Been There Done That" type of horse, meaning a gentled soul that isn't going to tear them apart, buck them off, run them over, kick or bite them, and they have been worked to the point of near boredom.  Well, I don't mind admitting I like that in my horses too.

Laura, besides being a horsey person, plays online games and I hear her from time to time playing with people from only God knows where, and they like to play the weirdest things too; one game is called "Never Have I Ever".   The game "Never Have I Ever" is a fairly simple one, you try to one-up someone by NOT doing something that most humans have done, and you get points for having never done it if they have. Simple, right?  Well, I'm listening to them play and I notice Laura over there in her room calling out things I've done that she hasn't done, to see if anyone else has done it, so she can get points. Apparently, she lived a rather sheltered life, and hasn't been caught making out with someone under a tree, she hasn't gone noodlin' for fish, and she hasn't stuck her arm fully up a cow's butt to pull out a baby that was turned around sideways.  I count myself a failure when I hear how many things Laura hasn't actually done, and it makes me wonder if Caity is any better educated with life experiences or if I failed both of them.

Reuben would be really bad at this game too; it wouldn't just be me losing.  He's been to several foreign countries because of the job he has with the United States Army and now the Oklahoma National Guard (He's in the elite 45th Infantry); he's been there a few times and done that a few times, I'm sure of it. One of the players called out from their computer somewhere that they had never driven a car! WHAT? Where are you? Who are you? Are you 10? Here in Oklahoma, we're driving tractors at 9 or 10, trucks and cars no later than 14, and on the roads by 16, most of us anyway.  Then another calls out, "Never have I ever kissed a pig", got me.  I've kissed pigs.  Another calls out, "Never have I ever sang on stage"; oops...that one took Laura out of the game! Boom!  I have sung on stage too, but Laura made money at it.  She was using the most interesting strategy for the game too; waiting until there were just a few left and then announcing (almost with pride) "Never have I ever skinny dipped"; NOPE...been there, done that...a few times. My good friend and director Michael Givens often tells me he can't wait to get to Heaven so we can do that again - - to which I laugh. I had my clothes on when we were in the ocean, now whether or not he did is another story and not mine to share. 

I guess there are times I wish I could say "Never Have I Ever " done this or that,  but there are more times I suppose that I would be lying if I said I hadn't.  I guess I can say I've never won the game "Never Have I Ever" that's a fact.  When we were kids we played "Truth or Dare" and I always took the Truth-telling because I didn't want to be dared to do something I would have to do considering I don't really ever back down -- I always tell the truth, even if it's brutal and too honest - - count on me to ruin your day in less than two seconds!  OK, here we go, "Never Have I Ever...parachuted".... ha! Reuben would so lose!  He's eaten camel spiders too -- I should remember that when I ask him to play; that may be a good match come to think of it. "Never Have I Ever played Never Have I Ever with my kids!" That may change.