You see people at the bookstores and they'll all lining up to read the latest self-help book, and for some, it's an addiction of sorts. You see them week after week, month after month, reading, searching, researching, trying to find that magical answer to their deep-seated issues regarding self-hate; here's a thought, stop hating yourself! At the risk of sounding real (and I do mean overtly) arrogant, or as my friend Tex would say, "cheeky", I think this blog being my own creation, and my own personal space in the universe where I can say what I want to say, and mean what I say; I think this blog warrants me saying to you right now to stop hating yourself and start appreciating YOU for who YOU are. Simple? No, it's not, but then again you aren't simple either, now, are you?
Suppose you close your eyes (not now, you're reading my blog) and you think about yourself as a kid; is that when the self-hate started for you? Can you pinpoint the time when you started saying things to yourself that you couldn't or wouldn't say to your grandma without being taken to the shed and whooped with a leather strap? Some of ya'll probably don't even know what I'm talking about, but there was a time when grandmas were the scariest things on the planet, and you tip-toed around them because if you said a word that didn't fit into their cluster of appropriate things to say, you were, as I said, taken out back to the shed and your backside was tanned up a bit either with a good strong piece of leather strap, or the nearest switch she could find laying around the yard from off one of her old fruit trees. Grandmas always had big strong fruit trees too; don't you remember? God forbid she ever asked you to get your own switch so she could whoop you with it -- kids are so dumb, they found the smallest thinnest greenest piece of tree possible, not knowing that was the worst pain-bringer under God's eye. Grandmas were (and are) the one things keeping you safe -- a Granny prayer can equal 100 standard prayers; you know it.
If you don't start every single day off with at least a dozen good solid compliments to yourself then you need to regroup, pull all 75 trillion cells in your frame into one big lump, pull yourself by your bootstraps, and look your pretty face squarely in the mirror so you don't lose sight of who it is you're talking to. You don't have to say a bunch of words you don't mean, and you don't have to lie to get the truth out either; you are absolutely and positively the ONLY you out there, and as such you deserve to be treated and admired for that single fact. You have everything you need to be perfectly you and any deviation from that united soul, body, mind, spirit, self is just off-balance and out of place. You have to put it back into place, polarize yourself to who you were created to be, and if you can't find that person, you do what everyone must do if they need advice about a product; you go to the Creator and ask Him what He thinks of you. He'll tell you - - you don't even have to listen for Him to tell you, He'll tell you. You do need to listen to understand. You are awesome.
Start out really simple and look at your face in the mirror. Instead of cursing at yourself, talk to yourself, and say what you want your heart to hear and understand. We all want to belong to something, so start by belonging to you; accepting you. If you need change, be that change. If you need help, ask for it. Look at your eyes, say something about them. Appreciate what they do. Look at your nose, again, out loud say what you think and what you need to hear, without being degrading, belittling, or rude to your nose. It's helping you breathe, isn't it? Talk to your freckles, your mouth, your teeth, your tongue, your eyebrows; and never forget your ears, never, ever forget your ears. They are so important. Once you get past your head move to your neck, your shoulders, your chest, arms, hands; stop at the palms and really look at the lines. Do you understand the lines?
Once you're finished with your hands, your fingers, your nails, and even the hair and freckles that cover you, move to your belly, and if you say something mean to your belly you deserve to be taken out back twice (tell your belly thank you). Move to your hips, your productive organs, even if they don't or haven't produced they are marvelous, they are created to create. They are so intricate and unique. There's that bum! Grab it! Let it know you see it and let it know you won't forget about it today as you thank you for all the things you mean to you. Those legs are not just for standing, walking, or crossing. When we think of what we would do without our legs we are immediately reminded of the sacrifice many have made for us in war, in combat, through surgery, diabetes, accidents. Thank your legs. Take a minute to rub them and let them know you'll drink more water to assist them with their responsibilities.
Finally, you're at your feet, aren't you? You can't over compliment your feet. It's impossible. They are some of the most interesting things you'll ever encounter and there they are just waiting to be loved by you. Polish your toenails, file the callouses, check your heels twice because they really need to be reminded sometimes, just how superheroish they are from time to time. God bless our heels! Once you've loved your body - - move on to your soul, your spirit, your mind. Don't chinch on this! This is WHO you are, your body is WHERE you are living. Find YOU and remind YOU of all the creative and wild imaginative things you want to see, hear, feel, touch, taste, walk through, and explore with that body of yours. Don't let your mind be a place you would not feel safe. Create within yourself the gardens of hope, peace, brilliance, and of course love - - places you build, places you want to share with others; but first, you have to feel good about it; about you.
You can't appreciate yourself without believing that you're worth appreciating; it's impossible. If you need to get a journal and write out the reasons you know you're fantabulously great, do it. You don't have to lie - - tell the truth. You have nothing to lose, and everything to gain and share with others. No one said you have to be arrogant, "cheeky", or conceited, but there's no reason to hold back, lie, or mislead yourself into believing you are less than what God Himself created. If you will sing a hymn about your assurances being blessed, and you don't love yourself, then why would you waste your own time trying to impress God with your song? He made that too. He knows already just how marvelous you are - - you won't ever over thank Him - - you can't. Love God, love you, love others. That's how it works.
You're welcome.
Photo: Emma Gatewood "Gramma Gatewood" to some.
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