Literally four years ago, less one day, I woke up (Aug. 3, 2020) and said to myself, "Jude, you're out of shape, something's gotta give". I weighed more than I wanted to, and I wasn't feeling happy about it. I wasn't really feeling that happy about a lot of things. If you remember, we were all locked down so tightly we couldn't move about freely without taking slack from the morons who actually believed we needed to be locked down, and because of all the political nonsense going on, most of the world felt defeated or at least deflated. I wasn't an exception - - that is until I made up my mind to do something about it.
On August 3, 2020, I decided to stop wearing masks no matter where I went and decided to tell people the truth; that the masks were making me sick. I couldn't breathe correctly. Since I was working out more, walking more, eating better, and drinking a boatload of water every day, I needed all the breathing I could get - free of distractions, and free of restrictions of any kind. I wasn't popular, but I was right!
Now, four years later, I've gained back nearly all of the 48 pounds I lost in 2020 from August 3 to December 31. I went on to lose another 10-11 pounds from January 2021 to about March, but staying fit didn't last as long as I wanted it to. I can't pinpoint it, but I just sort of stopped really making a conscious effort to eat correctly, exercise, drink the water, lose the sugar and the salt, and be the glowing and often radiantly sarcastic person that I know I could be. I slipped back into the comfort zone in 2023; I can pinpoint that much.
In 2023 I lost a job that kept the bills paid. It wasn't a good job, but I wasn't stressing either. I couldn't be bothered with diet, exercise, and being healthy, I had to find work, but the problem was, there was no work to be found. I found myself losing more than hope about it too. I found myself about to accept defeat when I put all of that negative energy into one big ball of concentrated effort and decided to live off my savings, what I could squeeze from the government legally, and let my kid pay her way and part of my way for a while. It was my turn. I decided to write!
When I decided to write, it was the same as when I had decided to diet. I put all of everything into it, and the result was way over-the-top productive. In 2023 I wrote and/or produced six books - - did you hear me? I wrote and/or produced six entirely new books that hadn't been written before. I created them out of thin air -- except for the 2nd Jude's Almost Daily Blog Book - - it had been written but not put together. I put it together, designed the cover, and published it...making it one of the books I produced in 2023.
That makes my decision to lose weight and become healthy again all that much easier because I know what I'm capable of when I set my mind to it. This past month I moved from one place to the next, and it was done so over three days in scorching heat and muggy humidity. We actually clocked 68% humidity here in Oklahoma City that day, when our average is 35% or lower. It was about 90-95 degrees but felt so much hotter - - we did have a few breezes and I do thank God for that. I walked more than 5 or 6 miles each day and climbed the stairs more than 20 times each of those three days. I was spent.
I realized that my stubbornness to continue was stronger than my will to stop and rest. I nearly collapsed a couple of times, and my right knee did finally give it up; refusing to allow me to subject myself to more of it. Could it be that I just don't want to grow old? I have this thing about feeling younger inside my head therefore I must be younger, right? Nope...no, I am not. I am on the cusp of being considered old. If I get any older I may have to concede that I am actually getting older, but until then, I will cling to my dwindling hope.
Today, just about an hour or so ago, I took my new dog Kiah for a quick spin around to the apartment side of the complex to see folks I hadn't seen in almost two weeks. To say they were happy to see me would be an understatement! We had a wonderful reunion, but my heart hurt. My actual chest was hurting from the strain of holding the dog back, pacing myself, and doing so in 99-degree muggy weather! It was 6:50 p.m. and nearly 100 degrees outside (the humidity today is hovering around 42%), making the heat index jump another six to eight degrees. I must be crazy!
It's on. Tomorrow is the new August 3, 2020....only it's August 2, 2024. I'll work out slowly, do my stretching, eat correctly, drink water, keep most if not all sugars and salts out of reach, and I'll do what I can to stay cool and get the rest my body needs. I have about 40 of those pounds to lose and I will lose it. I also have two more books to write in 2024 - - and I will. I have written two this year and published both. I've also produced two books, from print to ebook, so that they can be read on tablets and phones. I don't think I'll do more than two more this year, both dramas, not the crime books. The two books I wrote this year are both Nick Posh Thrillers. I wrote "1211" and "Mesa".
When I say "go" I mean "go", and I'm the only one I have to impress. There isn't anyone else who comes to mind who I would do this for - - just me. I am the only me I'll ever have, and I'm going to treat myself as if I was the best version of myself already -- it's a game I play with my own head and heart to get my body to follow my orders when I need it to. Something's gotta give -- and it will. I know it will.
Photo Credit: IStock.com
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