It is no wonder why this world is in the shape and condition it is in now. We have people who swore to God and before family and friends that they would love, honor, cherish, take care of, follow, and be best friends to a certain other person, only to cheat on them and treat them like crap. We have the worst track record here in the United States where it is easier to get a divorce, but it's just as bad in Europe and other areas of the world where it is not that easy. I have a friend (I'll call him a friend) in Scotland who is going through the two-year waiting period so he and his wife can be legally divorced. So stupid! Just sign the damn papers and be done with it. The way that woman is treating him now makes me wonder if she EVER loved him, or if she only used him to clean the house and babysit her kid; you know, the one she had with the other guy she mistreated and cheated on before she met my friend. God bless him.
I'm just so sick of this crap! I haven't had a date in over 24 years and if I go another 24 years without the trials, tribulations, pressures, and mayhem that goes along with dating, I'm OK with that. Just this evening I was reading a Twitter post where a woman gave dating advice. I don't know why she popped up on my side of the world, I'm not following her. Her advice to women was "Ladies if a man orders dessert when you're paying for the date, ghost his ass. Leave the restaurant and leave him with the bill." This was her true and actual advice to people who were dating. So freaking what, if a man orders dessert? Are we saying now that having dessert is out of the question, or is it the extra $5.00 you don't want to have to pay for him to be a little happier than he was? Tell me, I want to know!
I watched a man go into a store this morning and his wife was several steps behind him. I continued to watch as he not only didn't open the door for her, he didn't wait on her to catch up. He didn't walk around with her in the store. She got a buggy and I'm not kidding you, the man screamed at her telling her she was stupid for grabbing a buggy, he didn't want to be in the store that long and she wasn't "about to spend more than what I told you that you could spend"...that man would be run over with said buggy and then I'd back up and run his ass over again. No, I wouldn't. I would simply walk away and he would speak to my attorney the next day. I don't advocate violence, I only dream about it and write it in my novels. His ass would be the next man murdered in my next bestseller.
There's just no reason to treat people the way they are being treated. If you have no intention of keeping your promise to someone don't make the damn promise. You are in control of your actions. You either mean what you say, or you lied. You either meant it, or you did not mean it. You couldn't pay me to date anyone right now. I may marry someone but I sure as hellfire won't date them. I won't marry them either (him, not them, there would be only one, and he would be a man) unless God plopped him in my lap and said "This one is yours, you're welcome". That's the only way and if that happens you can bet that the temperatures in Hell have fallen by a few degrees. To put up with the "rules" or expectations of what is being dished out these days would be nonsense. Not to mention the wanton and rampant STDs and other creepy-crawlies that are flying around out there.
NO THANK YOU. Another friend of mine is permanently injured internally through a sexually transmitted disease that she can't get rid of. She is never going to be clear of it. She thought she knew the man. They dated for several weeks and got to know one another right? Well, he didn't tell her about that. They are no longer together, but she can't be with anyone else now. She's not alone, the stats on STDs in America are staggering, but they are higher in many and most other countries. It's absolutely incredible!! Before I could or would marry (because I won't date) that man would be run through the gambit wringer medically at my expense. He'd be cleaner than a new whistle by the time I said yes. If that sounds like something you don't want any part of that's OK, you're not the one I'd marry anyway, so there you go - - problem solved.
If you want the shock of your life go somewhere and people-watch. Watch how men treat their wives. Watch how women treat their husbands. I'm not talking about the dating scene now because people can pretty much fake their way through that except really they can't. Right now if a man in his 40s wanted to date he'd have to worry about that woman accepting his kids, he'd have to accept her kids, there would be too many in-laws, ex-laws, and blended half-this-and-that as well as the expense on watching younger kids while you go out. Who pays for that? Does the man pay for her kids to have a sitter? What if he's not interested in having more and she wants more, and then their relationship hits the skids when she finds out he's fixed but she's pregnant? Well, there you go...yes, that happened to another one of my friends. See why I don't date? NOPE..not gonna happen. Bob was dating C.C. and she ends up pregnant and told him. Bob looks her in the face and says he was fixed 10 years ago. She just walked away. Yep! What else can she do? She and Bob dated for 11 months. He can't get that back, can he?
What I found impossible to stomach is when Bob came over for coffee and cookies to tell me all about it, and he said he just now found out that C.C. also hated dogs! She didn't like the Beatles, and she didn't like half the places they went but went only because he wanted to go, but because of that she forced him to go where she wanted to go, and he hated it. Listen, people, you can go your own way and still be together!! No one expects, or shouldn't expect, their significant other to enjoy everything they enjoy. It's not like you are expected to spend 24/7/365 together. Have your own likes and dislikes, agree to disagree, and just chat without arguing over things that really don't freakin' matter!! Who gives a damn if this band is better than that one, or this team is great, or if this or that celebrity is pretty or handsome? Screw that, and just decide whether or not you're suitable for one another BEFORE you lie and cheat and steal and end up hating each other! (Who the hell even speaks to people who hate dogs? Why would you keep that from someone? It's going to come out!) GEEZ!!!
Gonna get really intimate here and give you a secret; staying celibate has been the best decision of my life. I mean, yeah, I'm glad I have my three kids, but not having to "be on" or "in the mood" or whatever else has been just wonderful. I think sex is fantastic, it's fantabulous, wonderful, and extremely entertaining, but if one or the other of the participants has to beg for it constantly, it's NOT worth it. It's OK to be tired now and again, but come on! Find someone who has the same likes and dislikes in that category rather than agreeing to disagree. The bedroom is your place, your choice, your thing, not for others to even know about. Don't tell your friends what you do. Tell each other what you want. Don't complain about it to other people. Talk about it. KNOW before you get burned is all I'm saying. Don't test drive to see if it's going to work out -- talk about it first, and get the nitty gritty down before you do the nitty gritty and find out your nitty is more gritty than his and he's not really into your kink. FIND OUT FIRST before you walk into the bedroom and see chains hanging from the rafter!
OK, back to the part where I say dating is for the birds. It is. Some birds mate for life too by the way, and I don't think there's a bird divorce counseling service out there. They work it out. People need to work things out before they go off (half-cocked pun intended) and make the bigger mistakes of their lives; mistakes that often or could have grave consequences. Here's a thought, and yes, it's really churchy...pray about it. Find God's answer and stick with it. He hasn't been wrong yet, that's one heck of a track record. I think that's why they say "What God has put together let no man put asunder." Let me tell you, just because you say "I do" doesn't mean you will. Too many out there proving that every day. If God put it together it will remain. Don't fool yourselves into thinking God wants you to be together if you know it's not the case. He knows...and if you've ever been divorced (guilty) you've not made the right decision, and He didn't put it together. Simple Math. Don't expect someone else to be the one for you if you can't be the one for them.
1+1=1 in the marriages God actually approves of.
Photo Credit: agreatimpression.com
No comments:
Post a Comment