Cats are Weird. That is All.

 We have an ironclad rule in our house; if you are seated and a dog is on your lap you don't have to move or do anything. You can order people about the house, making them do things for you, but you can't for any reason disturb the dog. I suppose there are reasons, but they are few and very very rare. You don't disturb the dog. The same rule does not and never will pertain to cats. Cats are not worthy of the loyalty and devotion I offer to my dog(s) because they themselves are neither loyal nor devoted to me. Cats are weird. We can all (mostly) agree on that one thing.

    So, to prove my point further, that cats are weird, I will tell you about Bilbo and Sam. Bilbo is MY cat. He's not quite two years old, but he's about twenty pounds. He's a big boy. He's a grey and black Tabby. He was given to us by a military friend who had another military friend who was being deployed. We end up with animals for all sorts of reasons; this is not new. Sam, on the other hand, was an adoption from the city shelter when my daughter Laura felt that she just HAD to have a cat to go with her other cat Frodo. Sam, by the way, is Sam Wise, he's Frodo's friend, right? See how this works? Frodo, Sam Wise, and now Bilbo. We are THAT family.

    Sam and Bilbo get along so much better and more often than anyone gets on with Frodo. Frodo is more or less a loner and by that I mean he only speaks to Laura. He tolerates me. He doesn't even come running when I shake the treat bag if he can't be bothered. Frodo is thin. Bilbo and Sam are so not thin. They always run when the treat bag shakes, and they wait on it as well.  They are simply not thin cats. Sam is another Tabby, but he's yellow; he is also at least twenty pounds. Frodo may squeak out 8-9 pounds if he's lucky. He's a Burmese grey/blue. He's very very thin naturally. 

    This morning, as they do, the "boys", meaning Bilbo and Sam, were in their usual position(s) of one dominating the other and looking THAT way. I usually click my tongue and shoo one or the other off of the other, and they resume in another room. They also lay around the bed(s) kissing and licking one another, presumably cleaning one another, but I really think they may actually be in a relationship. I'm not going to ask. I just continue to shoo them when I see them being what I would deem inappropriate. 

    We also own horses, so I have things laying about the house that goes with these animals. I have a crop whip, a shorter one, that I use on the dog (Tyrian the Boxer Mix) to keep him from walking into my room. He makes a mess.  He doesn't really ever get hit with the thing, he just sees me holding it or picking it up, and he walks away like a good dog.  This is NOT the behavior that either of my "boy" cats (Frodo is a boy too, but he doesn't give a damn about anything for any reason). Bilbo sees the crop is lifted and he eyeballs my hands, watching me and waiting for me to either use it or put it down. Sam tries to get under it. Sam likes being smacked with the crop whip. I never hit him hard, but that's how he is...he likes it. He's just so...well, inappropriate.

    This morning I was typing, just working, and my Bilbo comes over to let me know he was available for cuddles should I be in the mood; I am usually in the mood to cuddle my cat.  Sam saunters up to us while we're cuddling and he paws at Bilbo as if to say he is the only one allowed to show affection to him; so I cuddled both of them at the same time, which is always fun. Two fat cats squirming to get out from under the loving squeeze, you know.  Sam sees the crop whip on my desk and begins pawing at it, asking me to lift it. I do. He stares at me. He wants me to lower it. I do. He stares at me. He wants me to strike him in the rear with it. I do. He loves it. He rolls over and invites Bilbo over to cuddle. I stop. I walk away. I find a dog.

Cats are just weird. That is all.

Bilbo with Frodo, and Sam on the hope chest.

Photos by me.