Friday, June 6, 2008

Road Kill


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Our Army eats well. Way up in the land of the Midnight Sun, where days melt into night, and nights melt into the brains and eventually the sick twisted mind of the boy I often call my own - humor happens.

I'm not sure if he's watched too many shows on Adult Swim, or if he's auditioning for a future position, but this is the picture I got from my son when I asked him what he was doing now that the snow is melting on the ground and the sun is warming up the kiddie pools on base. (If you didn't already know, the boys in green purchased every last kiddie pool from their local Wal-Mart last year when they went on sale, and yes, Fairbank's Ft. Wainwright is home to more than 40 8' round blow up pools. Your Army, my Army, relaxes in complete style.) Photos soon, I promise.

(This could have happened) While driving his tank-type vehicle around town to get the kinks out of the gears, Baby boy ran across this irresistible photo opp. You shouldn't be surprised to find out that my son carries action figures with him in his tank, I've already told you that I swim and bathe with rubber ducks, a little red car, and a whale/shark thing. My son's not that far off from me - well, he is, but he can't be blamed, his father played with Tinker Toys...old school. With the wit and the speed he's been blessed with, the boy climbed out of his tank-thing and set up this shot! I'm assuming the two soldiers are friends; probably Reuben and his buddy Matt Clark, another PFC at Wainwright, who, if you asked him officially, would deny playing Army-Guys with my son, but you and I both know they love every minute of it.

"SQUIRREL! We're having squirrel for dinner! Woot Woot!"
(Son, please don't admit you're from Oklahoma, please! Don't do that to me. If you do, show off those teeth. I don't want anyone making the association for a tattoo to tooth ratio having anything to do with this photo. I know you're always looking for the next Pulitzer!) You can just about hear the excitement busting out of their little plastic throats of these two very differently dressed soldiers. I think one is from the Viet Nam era, while the other is a Desert Storm Trooper - it doesn't matter, Army men are all on the same team. I think they even let the official G.I.Joe command them since he has so much more seniority - albeit at this time he's quite a bit shorter than these men. At least Barbie and the Mary Kate & Ashley dolls have someone to dance with at the ball now - maybe one of them knows how to skin, clean, and cook the squirrel - is there a Kitchen Barbie at Toys R Us? Maybe Ken will loan the boys a few summer-time outfits for the party where this squirrel's going to be celebrated! It's gonna be big! Gotta be big!

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