The month of May is the month to be aware of the very very important need to be help others who are not able to cope with life the way many others do. For some "coping" means to push through the pain, just put it in gear and keep moving! That can work for awhile, but then things can start to really feel hard to handle, and the pressure of it all catches up to us; and walls begin to crack. For some it's more about hiding the truth from everyone because they feel ashamed, embarrassed, overwhelmed, or defeated. No matter what they do they just can't seem to find the good in a situation long enough to sustain something worthy for themselves. "Why bother anymore?" becomes a tiny question starting out, but then that grows into a thought, then a plan to maybe bring it all to an end. They say "No one will even notice I'm gone" or maybe they know someone will notice but they don't seem to think it really matters much. I hate that. I really do.
I say it all the time, and I really mean it when I say it, there really is another way. There really is a better way. I know, I know, it all sounds so churchy and over the top religious but in the end isn't it something bigger than you that you're looking for? Why not let that something be God? Why not let that something that can help be the help? Why not give in to the one thing that can actually do what He says He can do? After all, what do you have to lose by trying something a little churchy?
Mental Health is not something to keep quiet about and it's not something to hide or be ashamed of either. When we fall and break a bone we don't try to repair it ourselves do we? If we treated our emotions like bones it may make a bit of a difference when they became broken or injured. There are places we can go to seek help, but as the old saying goes, you gotta wanna before it really works. Believe it or not, there really really are people like me who do give a damn about how another person feels but some of us aren't that good at expressing that we care; you have to help us help you. There are others who pick up on the clues and the signs of depression and/or anxiety immediately, and they can offer assistance; you have to know there are others who will and can be depended on in most cases.
Stress and anxiety from change can happen even if that change is good change - - it's change! It hurts to be new, it hurts to try, it hurts to take a leap of faith - - but you don't have to do it by yourself when you realize that the month of May is also there for those who are willing and hoping to help. Maybe if we all sort of put in a bit more effort to seek help and serve others who need help, we'd all find a way to meet in the middle somewhere and make a greater effort to (at the very least) put some of the bad feelings and destroyed emotions on the better path(s) to being restored - - or reborn into NEW beginnings (that aren't so scary) and with open-arm acceptance for both the healers and the healees - is that a word?
A good friend from a previous employer told me tonight she just didn't feel like going on anymore because she's never felt that she had any say in how her life was going to go -- her parents commanded her in the beginning, she was in a rather abusive long relationship, once she broke free from that the man caused her to lose her long-standing job because he worked there too and had pull. These events led to depression, personal abuse, hateful thoughts about herself, and more. I hadn't spoken to her in about a year, and that's my fault. Things can spiral pretty quickly if events happen one right after another! Throw in a few lockdowns, deaths of friends and family, job loss and debt, children, or you name it, and you're looking at a heap of trouble for more than just the one person seemingly being affected by all of the mayhem! Suffering is never an isolated situation, and the chaos grows and spreads so quickly! We need many more May Days!! We need 24/7/365 awareness not only of our surroundings, but of our extended friends and family - - community!
I saw a poster in a doctor's office that read something like this: You feel good. Tell your friend you feel good. Encourage them to tell their friend too. We can do this over and over again and soon our entire community will feel good. Multiply that by another few communities and you've got a state feeling good - - take it another step further, get more states feeling good, you've got a good feeling nation. Dare we make it happen? YES....Let's dare!
Recognizing the problem is only part of the solution. Understanding the problems is just as important. Talking, sharing, caring, giving, being there, and just being willing to listen can be the greatest gift you can give sometimes. Being aware is not always giving or throwing money at the issue, but holding hands and really trying to understand where the other person is coming from, what is hurting them, and asking ourselves what if anything we can do to make that pain less or eliminated all together. No, it is NOT easy and YES, it will take time, effort, and actual self surrendering in order to be the change someone needs from you. When it all comes down to the wire - - why not try prayer?
Some people will say that it feels hypocritical to pray since they don't really believe in God in the first place, and that makes a whole lot of sense really - - but you put your faith in the chair you're about to sit in; why would you do that? You see it, you've been around chairs, you get the concept of them having a purpose. God has hands and He's never far away from you - - just waiting to hold you at the first request from your lips and heart. He is literally waiting to do that; He knew there would be times like this and that's why so many years ago He gave us the solution. ASK. Ask Him for His help. It's not the least bit hypocritical if you start believing by testing the waters to see if God really does care.
I wish every day was Mental Health Awareness Day. I wish everyone would stop what they are doing and say to someone in need "Hey, how are you today? Is there anything I can do to make your day better or help you find a way to smile again and really feel it?" We can't just sweep depression under the rug and pretend it doesn't exist. We can't expect people to snap out of it, or buck up and make things happen - - it's not within them to do that; not on a sustainable basis. Everyone can fake it for a little while, but we need real change and real care. We need real help and real social reform when it comes to accepting and understanding that there are so many levels of understanding and accepting. Compassion is the answer - - but so is action. Be willing to be there; it's not as hard as some make it out to be. Giving up a sitcom or a drama show to make a connection is a start - - so is texting an invitation for a conversation to start; be there for someone. There are a great deal of someones needing a good pair of ears to talk to.
I guess what I'm saying is May shouldn't be the only month we pay a bit more attention, but it is here now, and we do need to pay that attention - - it's a good place to start. If you need help please reach out and find it. Churches, community centers, hospitals, friends, neighbors, family, and even people who you think would maybe give a few minutes to you - - ASK! We can't all read minds, but we can all do a bit more to read souls if we try.
In the US: Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a Crisis Counselor
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