I'm making plans to move to Scotland, and in doing so I have to come to a few realizations such as the fact that I won't be driving when I get there. I mean, I could drive, sure, but no one wants that to happen really, and yeah, I don't want to have to explain to cops and judges why it is that I was ticketed for driving on the right side of the road. It's going to take some getting used to, so what I decided to do was to "practice" driving on the left; using the one car I know I can't get pulled over in, I use my Google maps "car". I am having too much fun, and let me tell you this, there is NO speed limit apparently because I can jump through time and space like no other in my invisible vehicle - - I am unstoppable.
When I jump on the Google maps site with a pinpointed location, let's say Tranent, Scotland, I can find a street and just start driving. I can choose to go in any direction, and I don't have to worry about hitting anyone. I don't have to worry about passing them correctly (do you do that on the right, I guess?) I am just scooting long, zooming really, and from time to time I even back and turn around so I can see what the front of the sign says so I know where I'm going. If nothing else happens, I won't be lost if I ever make my way to Tranent for real! I know those streets. I'm becoming more familiar with Musselburgh, Portobello, Joppa, and Dalkeith as well. Soon, and very soon, I'll head over to the west side of Edinburgh because that's probably where I'll end up living, I need to know those streets too. Too much fun.
My little car, I tell myself, is a comfortable little crossover, maybe a silver Ford Focus hatchback like Steve. Oh my gosh, I can make myself cry if I start talking about Steve. Of course, I couldn't drive Steve in Scotland because his steering column is on the left side, but maybe I could drive his cousin Callum! That's it, my new little zoom-around is another silver Ford Focus, a newer model, and his name is Callum! Here we go - - I'm on the hunt for a few roundabouts now! You have no idea! I tell people now, that I'm moving to Scotland to be in the land of roundabouts. I LOVE them...maybe I'm sick in the head, but I just absolutely love a good roundabout. If only the rest of the world ran on such logic. We wouldn't have to stop to pay for things, just sort of slide by when it was our turn, or maybe there would be no more waiting at the doctor's office, the Department of Motor Vehicles, or when we find ourselves standing in line to get into our favorite restaurant. NO MORE WAITING....just roundabout it, and move forward, always forward. Move on! Move!
Another thing I'm going to have to give up or get used to not doing once I hit Scotland, is the ease in which I just simply go where I want to go, and do what I want to do because I have said ability to do so. Because I do have a car here in the states because I can and do just jump into the car and go about a mile down the road to pick up a pack of toilet paper, a few groceries, and maybe stop by Braum's Ice Cream for a half-gallon tub of Peppermint ice cream. Not going to happen. Not fast anyway, and I won't be walking home with my arms loaded up with a twelve-pack of toilet paper and expect not to be mugged for it - - wait, that was 2020. I digress. I could probably still walk home hugging my Charmin if I wanted to, but I may have that delivered.
I'll be walking so much more when I move, so what I do now is I walk 2-3 miles a day to practice having to walk, having the stamina, getting in the workout, making sure I don't faint along the way. There's very little more pathetic than to see a broken-down woman on the side of the road clutching her twelve-pack of toilet paper eating a half-gallon of ice cream so it doesn't melt simply because she couldn't make it all the way home on her own! (I guess God did invent taxis, right?) I can always walk to the store I suppose, then get my things, and call a taxi to take me back if what I bought is too cumbersome for the trek back home - - see, planning is everything, planning is key, planning is my breath! I am nothing if not a good organizer. Viva la Strategy! Plan! Plan!
Let's see, besides not having a car, and having or needing to walk, I'm pretty sure there are other things I need to be aware of that perhaps I could be or should be practicing. Oh, I know, eating seafood. That's right, I'm not the biggest seafood fan, but knowing that I'll be moving to a place literally surrounded by the sea, and knowing that a mainstay of the land is in fact seafood, I may need to practice eating a bit of it to make sure I won't die of starvation and/or worse, become a vegan. I can't do that. I need to eat more seafood! That being said, I've been boiling up shrimp (prawns) every week, and I've put on a few cod and herring on the grill as well. I'm not going to attempt to lie to myself about eating oysters, not happening, but I will concede to trying things that don't have gooey guts, which excludes octopus; for good reason. Yeah, no.
This is going to be fun. This is fun. I'm doing it now, and I'm learning so much more than I expected to learn. I will say this, having traveled the same streets of Tranent over and over again, and seeing what Google took photos of over and over again, I have begun naming the people I see in the snapshots along the way - - they're really just passersby on their way to the park or the store, but they were caught on the Google maps camera right? So why not name them, give them purpose, make them seem as if they were meant to be part of my life. I see Helen and her friend Teri making their way from their cute little neighborhood on their way to church to volunteer, I see Bob and Maurice, they're twins you know, and I see Roni, the wee chap who was probably supposed to be in that little schoolyard, but he decided to ditch classes today and run off to Scotmid for a bite; maybe try to get the cashier to sell him a pack of smokes! Cheeky kid! I love my mind.
I wonder what I could find, who I could find if I travel the City Centre of Edinburgh - - so much to do there. So many faces. I'll certainly be walking a great deal when I go to the City - - but I won't stay there for more than a few days at a hotel I'm sure. I prefer the outskirts. Plotting is so very vital at times like this - - did I say "plotting", oh, I'm sorry, I meant to say "planning". Then again, a good plot is a good thing to hold on to as well - - Edinburgh is no stranger to murder; why not add a few new and old to the mix? Yes, I can practice that today in my mind of minds -- but first I have to park the car and hop a bus; if I do leave virtual DNA I don't want it to be in a private car. No, mixing my own DNA with hundreds of others on public transport makes a lot more sense in terms of hiding in plain sight. Did I say that out loud as well? I must be mad.
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