More Like "Provolone Hill Puppy"

Photo of the REAL Swiss Mountain Dog is not mine. Just found it on the internet.

We're not telling Brody, our new Jack Russell terrorist, that he's not a REAL Swiss Mountain Dog. We're telling him that his is a "cousin" to that breed, better known as the "Provolone Hill Puppy". You can see by his markings that he's going to be absolutely beautiful when he grows up to be the mammoth that he looks like he could be - - but for now he's just a little thing, a bit too small to jump on the bed without assistance.

Dr. Wayne Dyer would be so proud of me for the empowering and encouraging lectures I give to Brody, whose full name is Sir Henry Wallace Brodrick. I tell Brody that he's big, he's tall, he's brave, he's determined, he's tough, and he's on the path to the being the best Provolone Hill Puppy ever! I read quips and little quotes to him every day from my enlightenment calendars - - things like "From this day forward you are who you believe you are!" I tell him that he's doesn't have to be 120 pounds to be a Big Dog. King can be do that - - Brody just has to be Henry Wallace Broderick, the best puppy God intends him to be. (Right now he's working on surviving being tackled by his more agile and aggressive little sister Teagan who needs absolutely NO encouragement...none. She's got the Jack Russell heart of the fearless down just pat!)

For years I have had a picture of the Greater Swiss Mountain Dog on my refrigerator and I sometimes tease Matrix with it, telling him that he'll be replaced when he dies with one of these - and I point to the picture. He usually turns his nose up and walks away - - he knows I love him. For years I've told the kids that if we ever do get a big dog it's going to be a GSMD....and then Caity brought King home. Well, OK, but I want my Swiss Mountain Dog right? I mean, I'm the mom! I'm the one paying the bills (why is that?) I'm the one with the right to say who does and who does not live here (no I don't but I like to pretend I have that power.) So, when Caity got around to ALSO bringing the two little puppies home for us to foster - - for us that means keep, I fell head over heels in love with Brody. Even secretly giggling when the person Caity gave him to got in trouble with her parents and couldn't take him - - OK, c'mon, I only laughed a little bit. I wasn't mean about it, and she never really saw me do it either.

I kidnapped Brody immediately and began whispering in his ears that he was going to be the biggest Provolone Hill Puppy EVER....and where that wasn't quite the very very same as a Swiss Mountain Dog - - it was close! I've always wanted to be Native American, but that's not going to happen either, so I listen to Spirit music, and I go to the woods and meditate - - there are steps you can take to be whatever you wish! For me, I dream. For Brody, he just has to keep gnawing on the giant bones, pretending to be a power chewer and next time when his little sister grabs him by the throat and pulls him to the ground he can.....growl or something. Maybe, if she doesn't take his head off for it.

He's still young, we'll do this! Manifest it Brody boy! Manifest it!!