Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Cayenne Pepper Has Kicked My Gut!

I was thinking - which was my first major boo-boo, that taking cayenne pepper in pill form would be the end all to my weight loss problems because it was tauted as being the best metabolizer known to mankind. It may be....but the problem began just shortly after I took one of the 40,000 heating unit dusty red pills with only a few ounces of water. I didn't' have enough time to go to the refrigerator and get a new bottle of water to wash it down. Now, who in the world is so damn busy that they can't walk 25-40 feet to the refrigerator? Me, I guess.

About an hour after I took the energizing capsule there was a lot more going on than just the stomach acids waking up! Let me tell you - I had taken several of these pills in the past with food, one pill per meal, that sort of thing - but just using a water chaser was my 2nd big mistake. It didn't burn like cayenne pepper in your throat, your eyes, or in your mouth - it was the heat from the pill that sent me over the edge to the bathroom, pulling up my dress to expose my belly to lay on the cold cement floor! I was THAT hot! (I love saying I was hot, makes me feel all sexy, but really, I was BURNING UP).

So, after about 30 minutes of death, and the time regulated light having gone out in the office bathroom maybe 13 minutes into the heaving and breathing event, I was getting over it. I only got over it when I decided that against my strength, against my knowledge of what would happen, I took a leap of faith and drown myself in the sink - literally drinking from my hand like a lapping fool - because I was at that time, a lapping fool. I was drinking from both hands, in the dark, wondering if I was even with the living, but realizing that I was when I didn't hear any harps behind me. I heard the toilet system making a little knocking noise, but I didn't think it really measured up to harps. I was definitely living.

Well, to let you know, just so you know, I am giving the pills to my good friend who I have amply warned, and I fully assured that she will NEVER make the mistakes I have. She's a woman of greater wisdom - or maybe, just maybe, she's been an idiot like me and decided a free bottle of pills would be worth paying a bit of good health attention to! Whatever the case - good riddens to the pills, hello to downing more vinegar and water, and just doing the walking and the stretching on a daily. I would rather lose it this way than that!

Hope I can save you some heat on this one.

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