A couple of days ago I wrote a blog about having or carrying extra baggage around with you. We all do it, but for some, it seems the mere mention of it can trigger anger and upset feelings. I could say, "Buck up" or "Get over yourself", but the truth is, that there are some who are so internal with their emotions that even reminding them of their flaws seems to create a real tidal wave of frustration within them. For that, I am sorry. What I mean when I say I'm sorry, is that I'm sorry my friend felt the way he felt after reading my words. I wasn't talking about him, per se, although for some people you can mention the slightest similarity and they are so sensitive they simply KNOW you are talking about them! This was not the case, but it did lead me to write this blog, after taking down the other one.
I am an American, but when I get online and voice my opinion in a group that is primarily (and created for) Americans who have Scottish ancestry, I am immediately met with vicious (and I mean vicious) comments from native Scots who feel that anyone who was not born in their country can't possibly have an opinion about their country. This is so funny, as they have no problems spewing their opinions about what they think of us! Bit of a double standard that I think I've had to accept as being normal. Their words hurt me, but I'm again, not allowed to say it without being called out as a liar or being too soft.
Perhaps we could all do well by just sort of prefacing our words. Perhaps I could have said, "This blog deals with unsettled feelings and things we carry around with us needlessly as humans". This would allow someone who is overly sensitive the opportunity to bail before reading more and becoming upset. I think the blog was meant to showcase the fact that there are OTHER people who have baggage, but that they are willing to sit with you, hold your hand, be there to listen, and just try and be comforting. It didn't come off that way to ONE person, so since I was made aware of it, I did take that blog down. I won't be doing that in the future. It doesn't make sense to censor your work. It makes sense to buffer it maybe, but people do need to know there are others who will help in a crisis. (and face it, sometimes there are times when some people just need to buck up and get over themselves, as well.)
Another thing I noticed about the blog I took down, was that while I was general in my description of my friend who lives in Texas, another friend who lives in Scotland was upset about the fact that he thought I was talking about him because the two men had similar backgrounds. Seriously? Do you know how many singers and songwriters there are in Texas and also in Scotland? I can't go look at a house or flat for sale on RightMove without seeing a guitar or piano in the rooms! Texas, Tennessee, Oklahoma, and California produce more singers and songwriters than any other part of the world! What if I said my friend was six feet tall, had brown eyes, and a beard! He does! He also has tattoos, he drives a Ford pickup, owns about three guns, and he has a big pit bull! I'm just saying there's no way someone in another country should EVER accuse me of calling him out for his baggage simply because I wrote about my friend who gave me permission to talk about him without giving his name. He recognized that there will be those who relate to him and could use the help I was suggesting!
I think my point has been made. We all have things we don't like about ourselves, and things from our past (and in the present) that we can't really deal with, but we are saddled with them. I can't change the fact that I'm divorced, but it's been 25 years. I've never been to rehab, but I've broken down a few times and really had a time of it getting back on track. I had kids to raise, a job to keep, and an education to maintain. I sucked it up, and no it was not fun, but those kids depended on me being the strong one. Jesus had to be the strong One as I couldn't do it alone. That was my point in the blog -- it was not meant to send someone to the Moon with anger or emotions. EVERY LAST ONE OF US is carrying something. I just choose to give it up so I'm not burdened with it. The fact that I've NEVER cared what others think of me may be a good thing - - I just don't have to worry about my reputation!
Reputation is something you have because of what others think of you. Your character is so much more important and if we're all honest, a character flaw is worse than a rumor about you. We need to work on our characters and give up the hope of being Mr. or Ms. Popular! Who gives a damn about being liked to the point of being the social center of attention? Not me. If I make Jesus happy I'm good. He's the one that died for me so I can enter into Heaven, not these other people who couldn't hold a flame to what Christ has done for us. Anyway, I didn't mean to upset anyone, and though it is never my intention, it is still a fact that words can and do hurt, but we can't censor them or not use them. We can choose them. We can apply them, but we can't stop using them. I won't offer an apology, but I will say that I hope I can be more thoughtful in the future. Then again, I have no idea who may or may not read the blogs, and speaking the truth is just that, speaking the truth. I'm not going to be able to please everyone. Pleasing God is enough.
No comments:
Post a Comment