Periwinkle will be Published Again

 It's been 17 years since I first published the book. Dang. I had no idea that the photo on the back was that old! LOL.  Here I was thinking it was less than 10, but nope, it's on the book, and the book was published in 2006, so there you go. I guess I can take it off my LinkedIn profile now. It's a bit old.  It would be great to look that young again, right? Maybe it's my fault for thinking I do look younger, but then I see my face in a mirror and realize the truth...no, I don't like the truth. Let's go back to fantasy!

    Anyway, the poetry book was and is only 124 pages long. It's a 5.5" x 8.5" book, and only .29 inches thick. It's not a big book, but Amazon had it for sale for 17 years for over $21. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't change it either. I have no idea why they placed the cost so high. There are no photos inside the book. There is nothing special about it whatsoever, it was in fact, quite small. To me, it should be $8.00. I don't know what they will charge when I upload it again. I have no control over that sort of thing.

    I am waiting for Ingram Spark to tell me it has the file, and all is well because I have to resubmit it. I didn't realize I could change the mistakes in the old PDF, but I can, so I did. I have to upload it again, and I don't think they'll charge me for that. I think I have 60 days from the time they upload it to make any and all changes before they charge me.  I not only changed the exterior because they told me I needed to, but I also changed two spelling errors and took out a paragraph in the introduction. It has been there 17 years, and for about 14 of those years, I've been upset with myself for having given someone credit when really, they did not and they do not deserve my trust or respect.

    It felt REALLY good to undo that boo-boo.  The back and the front are slightly off in color, but really, when you have the book in your hand and you're turning it over from the front to the back, you don't see it. It's just a little darker in the back so you can see the writing. I rewrote the back as well. I shortened it, and 17 years ago I didn't have grandchildren, so I added that fact. Love those babies.

    I'll find out tomorrow or the next day when they do send me the status on the upload whether or not I can upload it without costs; if I have to pay I have to pay, but still, it would be great not to have to do that. Some of the better things in life are free!! I mean, if I wanted a copy of the book I would have to pay for it, but I can see why they don't charge authors to upload. We're not known for being all that wealthy you know. We write. We don't always sell. I would love to have a royalty check for $$$$$ for my poetry book, but we have to be realistic. I think I've sold 50 in 17 years. 

    I am actually writing my second poetry book too. I have about 40 of the needed 100 poems to do the sequel. I can push them out I guess, but I don't want to do that. I want them to be organic, real, and something that actually means something to me. I may actually ask my kids to write a few like Reuben wrote 5 poems in Periwinkle. He may or may not feel he is still a poet, but he did a really good job then, he may as well give it a go! Why not? Caity is really good at writing, as is Laura, but they write FanFics and Sci-Fi fantasies. Maybe I could get one or both to write a few poems! If not, maybe my grands would like to give it a try!! That would be great.

    Well, that's all I have for that. I will be publishing more books now that I know I can do it for free. It makes me happy just knowing I can type, format, create a cover, and boom! Book! YES!

Jude's Almost Daily Blog Book 2 is Being Published Soon.

 About two years ago or so, I wrote Jude's Almost Daily Blog Book, and then over the next few months, as I was saving for the book to be published and printed, I decided to write the sequel; Jude's Almost Daily Blog Book 2.  Well, as you can imagine, over the next 20 months or so I've written quite a few blogs and now have enough material to write a third and even a fourth blog book! OMG...yes, it's true, I talk a lot and write just as much.

    Well, while praying today the thought occurred to me (Thank you, Jesus) that I don't have to save for publishing anymore. I don't have to save for printing or distributing anymore. It's all free!! I know how to do the formatting. I know how to do the cover art. I know how to upload it, and I am going to write the 2nd, the 3rd, and probably the 4th books very soon. I am at the very least, going to get Book 2 published probably over the weekend! Dang, that makes me smile.

    To just say out loud, and/or in writing, that I'm going to publish a book this weekend, makes me really happy. I've sat here with the books just needing to be uploaded, and needing to be published. I just have to find out if they'll let me insert photos for free, I think I can. I just have to figure it out, but it's too late tonight, and I'm really busy tomorrow, but Friday, that is my goal. I'm going to find out if I can figure out a way to upload photos and have them inside the book. I don't know how many I'm allowed to have, and I don't know if Getty will let me use theirs for free, but I'll find out. I know I can join certain places for a month and get free photos. I may just do that. Woot!

    I don't even care if I sell a single book, I just like writing them. I did sell one book this past quarter, and I had to laugh because my royalty checks just hit my bank today; I guess maybe it was an eBook that sold because I made $2.99.  I did the dance. I was laughing. I mean, I can't really even buy a good cup of coffee with that, but it was just the fact that someone out there in the big, bad, world has my book and will be enjoying it this week! YES! How much fun is that?

    I will say this, I was at the airport one day, and I saw that one of my books was on sale in the gift shop. It nearly floored me to see it there. I have no idea why it was there, who had ordered it, or anything, but there it was. I told the clerk I was the author and she wanted me to first prove it, but then she asked if I would sign it. Sure, why not? She slapped an easy-peel-off sticker to the front saying it was a signed copy, and she upped the price by $5.00.  I won't get any of that, I was paid when it was purchased for the shop.  I loved it. I thought how fun? How fun for her, for the person who buys it, and for me. It makes my heart sing when I think someone may actually like what I wrote. Woot!

    So, Friday I will make it a point to find out about the photos. If they allow it, and I figure it out, I'll do it. I'll upload the book entirely on Saturday or Sunday after I make a cover for it, and format it. Then, after it's done, I'll start on the 3rd Book. I know I can scrape another 105 blog entries together, and more photos. I'll go out and take photos if I have to! This is gonna be fun. It may be the most unread and uninteresting book series EVER, but I wrote it, and I know I had fun doing it. 

    One person's boring book is another person's treasure of interest. I just made that up, should I put quotes around it? 

Photo Credit: Me

It's a Bit Much.

 You have NO idea how often you say something until you write a book and realize that damn, you say something a lot. You say the same thing, a lot!! I said "a bit" 113 times in an 83,500-word document that became my book "Murder Book".  I decided to go through it and take out about 78 of them. I had to substitute words for the most part, but other times I just rewrote the sentence. Dang. I'm not lying when I say I had no idea I said "a bit" just a bit too often. Makes me wonder how often I say "how often". 

    So, in the process of editing the books now, I have a list of words that I've used over and over again, and then I go back through the fat manuscript I'm currently writing to see if I need to edit out those words. You'd just surprise yourself; try it. Try writing a big fat murder book and then go back through it page by page and take out something that stands out and makes you think twice. In "Of Kilted Pleasure" I did that for the word "favorite" and something else; it's amazing! You just never realize it until you do a find and replace on it...and you scream! UGH!!!

    Well, this time will be the worst, because it can only get better from this point forward. I don't think I'll reload the romance novel. It will have to stand as it is. I may someday make it a 5"x8" book, but not right now. I'm focusing on the murder thrillers and they will all be the same size; roughly 83500 words, and all 5"x8" when they are formatted. It's about 220 pages typed in Word. It becomes about 395 pages when you format it. That's such a fun thing to do. I'm not lying.

    I have decided to keep the formatting large until it's time to make it into a book for uploading. I made the mistake of formatting Murder Book too soon, and then I couldn't go back to the larger pages. I had to work on a smaller scale. I won't do that again. I also won't repeat myself too often, because every single chapter that I finish, I will go back over and check it for words I used too often. In the end, I'll do it again to be sure I can get all those strangling word sets to be open, fluffy, more interesting, and entertaining. I love the fluff and stuff stage. I actually did most of the fluff and stuff as I worked each chapter this past time, and I'm noticing that I'm doing it again in Pinball. 

    It's sort of odd to realize that I'm writing and fluffing at the same time, but then again, I can always unfluff too. I did that with Murder Book, twice in fact. I'll end up putting the bits I took out of it into Pinball. Why not? They are sequential to a degree. Most of the thrillers will be sequential and that way a reader can pick up one and go to the next, I'll even say which books I've written so they can go back to the beginning, but right now I've only written one. LOL...you do have to have at least two to do that.

    Also, please remember, when you read a novel, be it romance, murder, storytelling, or whatever, it is a work of fiction and the writer is using regular or relaxed language. It is not an essay that will be turned in for a grade. There will be non-words, there will be poor grammar, and there may be misspelled words if you're reading one of my books. I also have a habit of saying things differently, and people email me to let me know how wrong I have been. I love it. Yeah, no need to do that! 

    I was in training for a week to learn how to write Auto claim estimates; mostly hail and collision.  I didn't have a chance to write anything on the second murder novel, but I did get some really good ideas as to some of the behaviors I may install into some of the lower or lesser-developed characters. I won't say what I want to say, but I will put it into my next novel. I actually have a t-shirt that reads "Be careful, you could end up in my next novel" and .... yeah; they will. 

    That's about it. I need to get my dinner ready, come back, and maybe write on the next book. The last thing I remember Nick saying to Fergy was that he wanted more of that old-time religion because he was fed up with the way parents let their kids run the household; not Eogahan...no, he's got it under control. He must be talking about someone in his mom's neighborhood. If I don't keep an eye on these characters they start talking, and when they talk they make plans. When they make plans, they take over my keyboard - - before you know it, I'm throwing a party and everyone is invited. It happens.

Photo Credit: The Times of India

    

Write Your Book! It Can be FREE if You Do it Correctly.

     I say "free" and what I mean by that, is that it didn't cost me any out-of-pocket money to write and then publish my book. It was literally free, but you do have to have a computer with Word, and you do have to have internet access. I'm not talking about 100% totally free, but you don't have to pay a big-time publishing company, or even a small boutique publishing company to publish, format, and/or design your book. You can (with a bit of patience) do it yourself. I'll explain. 

    I'm going to use "Murder Book" as an example because I have paid for every other book I wrote prior to Murder Book, to be formatted, edited, published, and then printed and distributed. You do still have to pay if you want to promote it, but I bet there are ways to do that by word-of-mouth, and other formats such as Tik Tok, and Facebook; the list is endless.

    OK, so you want to write a book, and you've got a story to tell. Great, get your computer, and be sure you have a word processor loaded onto it. I use Word by Microsoft; others may use Google Docs or any other format. I prefer Word.  I really preferred the older versions, but then again, the new versions probably have more capabilities when it comes to the actual formatting of the book. It's a trade-off.  I wrote Murder Book in about 2 months' time. I started it in genuine in June, but I had started a bit before that, just sort of playing around with outlines and such. We'll say I wrote it in two months. Then, I called around, hunted the internet for places to just take the document in Word, which was 83400 words or so, and to just format it using a 5"x 8" book, and I needed a cover for it too.

    I ran into three major problems. (1) Either they could format it and not do the cover, or (2) they could do the cover, but didn't want to format the book, or (3) they could do both and they were really expensive. I tried contacting folks on Fivver who were talented, experienced, and needed a good reference, as they are usually cheaper. I found GREAT people, but some of them seemed REALLY shady. I had a gal promise me to do the formatting for $10 and that just seemed crazy since I had paid an actual professional publisher over $700 for the same service a few months back. Why or how could she do it for $10? Turns out I was being RIPPED OFF by the publishing houses. I can do EXACTLY what they did for zero cost! NOTHING.

    The lady who wanted to charge $10 told me how. I sent her $10 by the way. I don't count that as part of my book prep, it was more or less a thank-you. She appreciated it. She told me how to do the format, which two videos on YouTube to watch, because they were really close, but a little different; she felt it was good to point out their ideas and methods were really good, but they do have slightly different results. I watched, I learned, I took notes, and then I applied my new knowledge, and guess what, it worked.  I managed to format my book in less than 30 minutes. I can do the next ones much faster, but I was learning how, and even 30 minutes isn't bad. I waited four weeks for one publisher to get my book formatted and sent to me for approval. I did it in 30 minutes!!

    You write your book, and you save it as a PDF. Then you go to Microsoft tools and you input all your needed measurements. I'll actually make a blog soon with all the directions. That will make people happy.  Anyway, I wanted to know if I had the ability to possibly make a cover that I liked as well. Turns out I do.  I watched about four or five videos, and the ones I found most helpful suggested that I go to Adobe and download it for a month (free trial) and then go to Canva and do the same. Canva has a 30-day free trial as well.  I went to Adobe Stock, and I downloaded 10 free photos that I may want to use in the future for books. I think I screwed them up when I downloaded them as I resized them. Don't do that. I may have to do another free month using another email address to get the same photos but in their original size.

    Once you download the photo you want you upload it into Canva, AFTER you download the KDP book cover format template, which also is free. You just have to find it. If you use the Canva book design tool they tell you where the sites are, and there are more than just KDP, but I know they do 5"x 8" books, so I went there. You have to do a bit of research, trial, and error, practice, and have patience, because you have to get the spine width to fit your book size. My book has 395 pages. It is 83400 words, and I am using regular paper, nothing fancy. You'll find that fancy adds width. So, once you have figured out your sizes, you add that to the Canva template, and you upload your photo for the cover.

    The front cover is what you're uploading, the back cover is handled differently. You choose your texts, you put them in, you choose colors, you change fonts, but remember if you use a font that is not open-sourced, you may have to get a license to do that. That can cost you, so remember to also do your research to find the fonts you need and want. There are thousands that are free, you'll probably find many you can use.  When you get the front cover done, you read the instructions on Canva to show you how to upload the solid color for the back, stretching it over the entire border of the template. If you don't stretch it the distributor will kick it back saying the size is off by fractions of a fraction of an inch, but it matters. COVER THE DAMN TEMPLATE.

    Done. You have created your book in Word, you have saved it in Adobe as a PDF, uploaded it into MS, and formatted it, you've researched to find out how to change your chapter styles, your headers, your footers, your numbers, heck, you've even done your freaking cover for FREE!! WOW!  The next thing you do is upload each, two separate files, into your Ingram Spark account under new titles. I use Ingram Spark, you can use KDP or whoever you want.  Ingram Spark is not charging to upload a title. It used to cost $50 for the book and $50 for the cover, but they had a bit of competition recently, and they dropped those charges. Woot!! (again, if you want to promote the book it will cost you, but writing it and getting it to the point of distribution doesn't have to cost you.)

    I paid $1250 for "Faith Walks" to go from my computer to being a book. I paid the same or close to it for "Of Kilted Pleasure" and for "Jude's Almost Daily Blog Book". I paid about $700 for my less than 100-page poetry book. NOT AGAIN. "Murder Book" looks as professional as any of my other books, and I did it for NOTHING. You can't count the cussing, fussing, screaming, or wall-kicking moments that I had. I will be so much better with "Pinball", in fact, I've already downloaded the cover for "Pinball" and about four other books I will write. I know they will all be about the same size, so I used that same template. If they are not that size, I'll simply fluff and stuff until they reach that size.  I'm happy with my newfound creative side.

    Was it easy? HELL NO. But, I did learn a great deal not only about book creation but also about myself. I won't format for others, but I will do what my associate did for me, I'll tell people which YouTube videos to watch, and where to find the right templates. I'll list the steps below. Let me know if you're wanting to write a book and publish it for NOTHING. I'll send you in the right direction if I can. Woot!! 

 (email: jude.stringfellow@gmail.com)

Photo Credit: Canva.com

How to format a book using WORD:  (1)  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MVpdQcDpSk

                                              (2) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em9lLPb-M9s

 

How to create a Book Cover in Canva.

1.       Watch the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ldvCEutpYf8&t=110s

2.       Use the KPD Cover Calculator online for free: https://kdp.amazon.com/cover-calculator

3.       Get an Adobe Stock free trial subscription: https://stock.adobe.com/promo/firstmonthfree?gclid=CjwKCAjw8ZKmBhArEiwAspcJ7lNTfgpjM7QQJIAC1YgcrrcEKpZikwZpjfPpEBDKU4iYA-GjrH0OUBoCBRIQAvD_BwE&ef_id=CjwKCAjw8ZKmBhArEiwAspcJ7lNTfgpjM7QQJIAC1YgcrrcEKpZikwZpjfPpEBDKU4iYA-GjrH0OUBoCBRIQAvD_BwE:G:s&s_kwcid=AL!3085!3!646642325987!e!!g!!adobe%20stock%20free!284119129!16998447289&as_channel=sem&as_campclass=brand&as_campaign=US|CPRO|Stock|PURCH|AS_Brand_Exact|GG||&as_source=google&as_camptype=acquisition&sdid=KQPCU&mv=search&as_audience=core

4.       Get the Canva free trial subscription: https://www.canva.com/free/

 

Insurance Adjusters Have a Job to Do.

 Everyone thinks they pay too much for auto insurance; some even think it shouldn't be forced on people. Let's go down that rabbit hole, shall we?  If carrying minimal coverage on a moving vehicle wasn't mandatory in all states, how many folks do you think would carry their liability insurance? How many people would cover their cars and trucks if their finance company said "Hey, it's OK, we trust you, you can just keep liability, and if anyone hits you, they can pay the payments, and restore or replace your car."  Well, think harder.  The answer is NO ONE.  Insurance is expensive, and it's expensive for several reasons. One of which is clear; the insurance carriers are expected to pay claims.  Have you ever stopped to think about just how many accidents and what I call "idiot moves" there are on a daily basis just in the States?

    In some parts of the United States, we won't name names, the people under the age of 25 just seem to think that the laws either don't exist or that they don't have to follow them. When a person doesn't carry insurance, then hits someone, or causes an accident, YOUR premium, my premium, and the premiums for any and everyone will go up a bit. Consider an entire group of people who are under a certain age; now think about those who are much older. So many older drivers should not be on the road. They often can't see clearly, or respond quickly enough, and they cause accidents or idiot moves as well.  Now, throw in a bunch of people who don't live in our nation legally, who feel it is not necessary to follow rules of any sort. They're out there driving as well.

   You can't, (with any sanity) expect an insurance carrier to just dish out the funds to pay for all the replacements and repairs needed if and when these accidents happen. If they did a car would literally cost a person over $200,000 for the privilege of driving, because only cars that were covered by carriers could be on the road. You pay the insurance company for the car, not the dealer, that's how that would work. We have it so much better than people know, but most have their heads stuck in the sand thinking the big bad insurance companies keep jacking up their premiums and they never pay claims. When there is a claim, they say, the insurance carriers tell their adjusters to only give someone the bare minimum! This is so far from the truth, it's hilarious.

    We (adjusters) are trained to give exactly what the car was worth just seconds before the accident. You can't expect to wreck a $5000 car and walk away with a new $35000 car; it doesn't work that way. We take depreciation, we take betterment, we take the year, make, model, options, and wear into consideration. If a car has a dent or a ding, we're not going to total it, but we are going to lean towards totaling a car that would cost more to fix it than it is worth. When we do that, it's an estimate, not something set in stone. The owner still has the right to say "fix it" but if the carrier of the insured party says no, it's probably going to be a no. They'll end up paying the person what the car is worth; which isn't always the best solution, but it is one that makes sense. As a matter of law, insurance companies can't give a person MORE than what they had. They can't better the situation; that may come about through personal bodily injury, but not property damage. 

    Adjusters KNOW, we KNOW that our estimate is low. We can't get up under the car. We can only write what we can see. We can't pull off the bumpers to see the damage behind it. We can't look up under the car really, there will be damage we can't see, so that's why there are supplements to all (all) estimates. We even encourage people to go to the shop (two or three) and get an estimate. These shops can even use OUR estimate to start with and make those needed changes. If they are reputable we usually pay for it. We're in the business of coverage and restoring people; it's not an us-against-them scenario. We're neighbors, friends, colleagues, just like you. I promise you, I'm always going to err on the side of the insured; my insured. If you're my client, I'm going to give you the estimate I would give myself in the same situation. I want you to be restored. We usually accept supplements from the shop without issues.

    When the damage is under a certain amount, say under $6000 to give an example, many adjusters have the authority to just go ahead and pay those claims; it's when a car or truck hits the "over threshold" limits, that we have to give it a total loss and bump it to upper management. We still have to write the estimate. We don't get out of that; in fact, we have to write the estimate, find the salvage price, and figure out if there is any way to save it. It hurts us, just like it hurts you if there are overpayments; it all trickles down. We pay insurance premiums too.

    It's when insured lie, hide things, don't disclose things, or try to get one by the companies that we deploy investigators and the like. Body shops for auction houses are notorious (infamous really) for being really good at concealing prior damage caused by floods or collisions. A person buys a used car and they want to check the CarFax...OK, but the only people who report to CarFax are the insurance companies after a collision or flood. If someone had a wreck and had it fixed without a claim, that car could be a time bomb waiting to go off; and CarFax won't know it.  If you're going to buy a used car you need to take an experienced body shop person or car adjuster with you to show you where the welding marks may be, or the replacement parts, or other than factory parts.

    While we're talking about other than Original Equipment Manufacturers, let's talk a bit about After-Market, Recycled, and Salvage pieces. They sound bad, right? They're not. They are usually just as good if not exactly like the O.E.M. parts, and most of them are warranted for the time you own the car; check into that. We're not talking about pulling a piece off a wrecked car; that's another story. We're talking about pieces made outside the factory, but they are absolutely equal in most ways. I would say every way, but I don't want legal issues. They're really good parts. You save money because you cut out the middleman, and they're guaranteed. They have to be painted, undercoated, the whole work. There are laws about that too.

    So, I guess what I'm saying is, before you go off half-cocked thinking your adjuster was too busy to come out to your house to see your car, and you had to send in pictures; remember this is 2023.  We can actually get you your check FASTER this way, and save us money, which saves you money.  That trickle thing works both ways. I can only write what I see. If you send me crap pictures, I'm giving you a crap estimate. When you get to your shop they'll supplement it, but the adjuster most times, will not "make something up" or intentionally leave something out. We have very very regulated software. We're not allowed to close out a claim until we've gone through the steps and have obtained the green lights to move forward.

    There, I feel better. 

Photo Credit: CarPro.com

Hermione Granger, Much?

 When I was born I was not very healthy. No, I wasn't that "bouncing" baby, by any stretch of the imagination; some in the delivery room (including the doctor) believed I was stillborn. A nurse, we don't know her name, decided I wouldn't die, and whatever she did to me has never been discussed. I don't think my mom knew in fact. She may have breathed into my nose, she may have spanked, me, whatever it was, I began to breathe. I didn't cry. (That came later) I was given a chance; God had another plan, I suppose. 

    I've never been quiet except that ONE time; that's it. The ONLY day in my entire life that I have shut up has been noted as being my first. It's the whole, "I was dead, but I got over it" thing. I'm here to say, I've absolutely mastered the art of being heard no matter where I go.  This week I am in training for becoming an Auto Claims Adjuster. I could be independent, or someone may end up hiring me, but I'm learning to estimate cars. It's fun, challenging, and very important actually. I love it.

    During the training, we have about 38 people left. We started out with 47, and this is only day 3. I think we'll lose a few more tonight, and maybe end up with 24 when we finally reach the last day. It is not easy. It is tough. It is competitive, it is just really great content. The class is intense on purpose. We had to pass a series of testing and videos, and modules, all full of (stuffed with) information about cars and what happens to them during and after catastrophic events such as hail, tornadoes, floods, collisions, even vandalism, and hiding larger animals. 

    The course is designed to teach several people at once, so naturally the instructors would love to see more people than just me answering the questions. I do far more than my share of answering because so many people are either shy, lazy, unwilling, or they don't know the answer. I wait...I usually wait several seconds and then when no one chooses to answer I raise my hand. I feel there are at least a dozen more who actually know the answers, but they just don't want to speak up because if they are wrong they feel badly for missing the answer. That never bothers me. I just say "Oh well, I thought it was that" or "I missed it". I don't freak out over not knowing everything dang detail. 

    People are too sensitive. If you miss it, you miss it. At least you tried, and it's worth something to stand up and try! Today, before the day even got started, one of the instructors said "Jude isn't allowed to answer anything today." That was hard. I was over here dying!! I felt like Hermione Granger! My hand was on under my thigh so I wouldn't raise it and we're in Zoom, so I don't need to do that. I am an obedient student, however, and I did exactly as I was told. The instructor privately messaged me to say "OK, I'll let you if they can't".  That was nice.

    We did a Kahoots game, and I placed 4th, that means that others do know the answers!! I got 17/18 correct and that means that there are questions I don't know the answer to. They were fairly easy questions; not gonna lie, but still.   One person who placed above me said she was floored that she passed me. Please, I am by NO MEANS the standard. I just have a big mouth! I don't like to sit still if I know the answer and no one else is willing to say it. I do wait. I really do. 

    Well, for the next few days, we'll be crammed and jammed full of information. I hope I don't pop. I will be writing estimates in my sleep, I know I will be. After our final project, which is next week, I'll hopefully be able to take my own car and do an estimate on it, and then start going to parking lots and looking at damaged vehicles to see if I can do it there. I may go to a body shop and see if they'll let me hang out and write a few. It's good practice. One of the things I love about my instructors is that they are incredibly patient. I would NEVER have been so patient. I may have a knack for remembering things, and for speaking in public, but I am not as patient as they have needed to be. I would be zapping people - - you're gone, NOPE, no more excuses, I don't care. NOPE...gone.

Photo Credit:  ME...but I took it off of Kahoots. (I added the 4th out of and I think it was 38 actually....I found that out afterward.)

Be Prepared. It is a Choice.

 I'm going to try and be positive while writing this blog, but to be honest, I'm just over here shaking my head and wondering why folks will show up to a scheduled Zoom call completely unprepared.  We were told, (told, told, and retold) that it would be required to have a desktop or laptop, two monitors, a headset with a mic, as well the ability to download a certain program. We were told. Let me try to get that through, we were given at least 3 separate emails letting us know that before the Zoom we were to have these things in place.

    I get it if a person can't afford the desktop, the laptop, the monitors, whatever is needed. I do get that, I've been there a dozen times myself, but it is required. I have had to tell my kids so many times that we can't afford this or that; if you can't, you can't and you move forward or try to find a way. It may be that you have to wait until you can afford it before you can participate, but to show up to the Zoom where 50 others are ready to go, and not have what you need, is the epitome of not being ready. It doesn't mean that a person is a bad person; they're not being selfish or rude, they are just not ready. People, we have to be ready. We are required to be READY. 

    I'm thinking that being prepared for whatever can happen in life is a learned thing; we are to be taught. We need to be taught. This means we have to be willing to be taught. We do that by showing up, listening, following directions, and asking questions. Listening is extremely important. If we're not ready to listen, to gather the intel, to understand the situation, we're not going to be ready or able; we may only be willing.  Why am I going through this rant?

    I'm on a Zoom training session with about 50 folks. We've all been waiting for this particular class for over a month. Through a series of emails, we were told we needed to have certain components of equipment, we were told to download a certain program, we were told to show up at a certain hour, and we were told we were required to have a camera as well as a headset with a microphone. This is 2023. This is NOT something we don't know; however, we simply have too many lazy folks who just can't get their act together, or they don't put an urgency to what is required.

    Don't blame me for being direct. Don't blame me for speaking the truth. Don't blame me for being frustrated and disappointed with the generation(s) who think it's OK to be late, OK to be slack, OK to be less than what is required or expected. Why should 14 of us wait for the other 36 who aren't compliant? I remember in 2011 when I was asked to interview enough folks to meet the criteria so Xerox could hire them for open enrollment. We needed 80 folks. I had to interview 600+ to get 74 because so many folks were unwilling to be drug tested. Seriously?  Those that did pass that test were woefully unprepared for the first day due to either not being able to wake up, show up, or do what is expected of them.

    I didn't want to say it, so I'll let the instructor's words do the job for me. The instructor, who openly stated his age to be 46, said that out of the 50 people who were to show up and do the work as expected today, 48 did in fact show up, but 11 of them were late. He stated that 11 others were early, and the rest were literally signing in exactly at 8:00 a.m. CST.  He commended those of us who were early, and made the statement that of the 11,  9 of those people were "Boomers". There were no "Boomers" to show up on time or late. He then went on to say that there were too many folks under the age of 40 who either didn't have the withal to show up, sign in on time, or to have whatever was required of them.  The 9 "Boomers" to a person, had their equipment ready, their download ready, etc. He was making a specific point. I think I'm willing to make it as well.

    We may be older. We may be "over the hill" but most of us can still climb it without having to check our social media, take a selfie, and call a friend to ask for directions as to which way we were supposed to go up that hill. The generation just below mine is mostly responsible, but the one below that is disastrously late, and they don't give a rip to be apologetic because they don't actually think that their behavior is out of line. This, as they say, is our future. Welcome to a disorganized mess, is all I can say if that is what the world at large wants to accept.

    I'll give you ONE MORE example before I go. During the scheduled training the instructor gave us all a break so the ones who were not downloaded, prepared, and/or set up could do so.  He said, "Be ready, come back at 9:30".  When that moment came, there were six (6) people who took their damn break rather than taking the 20 minutes to set up what needed to be set up. When he drilled them about it, they said "You told us to take a break" I am NOT kidding you. This is where we are folks. Do we blame these people, or do we blame their parents? I bet you can't blame their grandparents!

GEEZ LOUISE!!! 

Photo Credit: Satsang.com

Pinball: Chapters Just Flying!

 After a true and real fight with Microsoft Word which just decided on its own to change the way I view the pages I am writing, I was finally able to beat the crap out of the keyboard and write FOUR chapters of the book this weekend. I wrote one chapter yesterday, and I wrote three chapters today. I'm really getting into this book, and I would not be surprised whatsoever, if I ended up writing the dang thing in less than a month like I did "Of Kilted Pleasure", but not for the same reason. 

I wrote the romance novel in less than a month because I thought I was going to be hired soon, and I wanted to get it published before that happened.  I'm going into training tomorrow with my claims adjuster career, not employment, but training, but after having the intense training I will be hired. It's just that I'll be working over 60 hours a week when I am finally hired.  So, in some ways, it's the same, but the reason I think I could end up writing the book in just a few weeks is because it is just flowing out of my head and into the computer.

    Dang!! I sat down to write the second chapter thinking OK, I think I want to say this, or that. Then, before I knew it, the characters started talking to each other, and they made up stories, and decided things that I really couldn't disagree with. It was all I could do to keep up with them; my fingers were hitting the keys and my mind was thinking out loud in about six different voices! Posh said this, MacRae rebuts, then the good doctor comes into the mix to agree but throw in a scenario. I was all over Wikipedia looking up every serial killer's personal psychosis to determine which one or two of them could fit my characters!! FUN TIMES.

    I found a few really gnarly killers who I had never heard of, and of course, I wanted to spend time reading all I could about them. I just had no idea. I know it's something we all live with; people standing next to us in the grocery store could be a wanted-and-hunted preditor. It's just that I wanted to put two and two together a bit slower with "Pinball" but it doesn't seem as if I'm going to have that right. These characters want nothing else but to be alive, to stand up on their own, and speak!  OK, that's my cue! I'm their voice. I have to go where they want to go. 

    It's kind of funny really, because I love writing, and what I do when I'm not typing out the story, is I'll sit in my big chair with a dog or two, and I'll literally put a pen to paper on a clipboard to think of things I want the next chapters to include. I go to the latest (or one of) Erle Stanley Garner books I've been reading, or a recent Wilson's Tales of the Borders perhaps, and I'll find something fun to start the conversation, and just build it from there. These books never fail me. I take what I read, I rewrite, add to it, mix it around, and make it my own. There's nothing new under the Sun, so why try. I think someone once said there are only so many storylines out there, the rest are a combination of these. That makes sense.

    The science of psychology will be strong in this novel. The characters exhibit it, they discuss it, they run from it, and they create a good dose of it. I named it Pinball because the murderers (there are several but two in particular) will have similar experiences in their lives which could have caused their manic behavior. I'm by no means claiming it, and there will be a good disclaimer at the front of the book as well, so no one thinks I'm claiming to be a medical expert.  Pinballs are bounced around, they are shot back and forth. They experience life from a defensive mind rather than an offensive one; they believe what they are doing is justified when it is clearly not.

    One character will have had pinball experiences and NOT become a serial killer. He will not become harmful, so why is he different, why did his life not fall into the pattern that the other did? Was it love? Was it Christ? There was a reason. The book will not be a book of faith by any means, but we can't escape the fact that when a person is grounded in a worldview, they tend to act in what is their accordance with pleasing their Superior Being. In the case of Eoghan MacRae, that Being is in fact Jesus; and of course, His Father, God.

    I'll describe the brain matter as it is described in medical journals, but I won't be giving it verbatim, and I won't be crediting anyone in particular probably. I may mention that so-and-so said or believed, but this is not a medical book, it is a novel, and it should be understood that it is 100% fictional with tidbits of truth to keep it functional and interesting. In other words, I may say they ate a hamburger with extra pickles, but I don't have to credit the maker of the burger or the farmer who grew the cucumbers. It is what it is. 

    OK, well, I have to go to bed and get ready for tomorrow. It's going to be an amazing day. I'll be studying auto policies and what happens after a claim! Woot!! I'd love to say that work is as intriguing or as interesting as writing is, but I would be lying through my fingers if I did.

    Photo Credit: Etsy

    

Waffle House / The South's Equivalent to Camelot!

If you're from the South you get it. If you're from anywhere else, you have to come here to get it, but Waffle House is the best restaurant, the most "American" restaurant there is. Fight me, if you think I'm wrong. I'm not wrong. You haven't experienced America if you've not been to a Waffle House (pick one, any one of them) at say 2 or 3 in the morning for a bit of food, and a whole lot of WHAT THE HECK IS THIS?

    It's been a minute since I've been to one, but after watching a few videos of what's been going on at these places, inside these hallowed squares, I think I need to venture back to one of the yellow-roofed master chef experiences; it could be a calling. I'm not sure. It could be that I just can't believe all the things (crap) I'm missing by sleeping in my bed at night, and not hanging out with the Wafflers. 

    A few of the more recent videos I've seen involve the staff (they are all specially trained, by the way) either dancing, singing, and/or twerking while cooking, they are also deflecting chairs, throwing dough, spilling coffee that didn't taste as good as perhaps one customer thought it should; they are tearing it up! People go in now to video, to upload stories of what they see and witness on TikTok to see who can get a better Waffle House video. No kidding. It's really addicting to watch.

    I know that in the 80's I used to go to the Waffle House after performing as a stand-up comedian. I would go in around 2:45-3:00 a.m., maybe get a big breakfast, maybe just some water with about 10 lemon slices, which could be considered 4 lemons.  I'd be the one dancing, but the staff would always join in with me. We'd have fun then, and that was 40 years ago. Times have changed a bit, I don't remember there being any mean brawls, which are being reported now. I remember laughing, dancing, one-upping, and meeting people you have never seen before because they were on their way to Dallas or something. 

     Matthew Mitchell, the Southern comedian on YouTube just posted a really fun video about the staff at all Waffle Houses being trained in martial arts as well as culinary specialties. He's not wrong. He's like "We'll teach you to chop, cut, poke, punch, and then we'll teach you to cook too!" He's not wrong. Kid Rock has a history (2007) of being arrested at a Waffle House. More than a lot of folks have been killed at a Waffle House; it's just a magnet for such behavior, and probably (no doubt) because it's always open. I know that Denny's has a slogan of "Always Open" but Waffle House is right there. They don't close. They stay open during pandemics. They stay open during tornadoes. They stay open during hurricanes. It literally took FEMA to close them down in some instances. People were not happy about it either.  (There are more YouTubes about that as well.)

    People get engaged at Waffle House. People get married at their favorite Waffle House. People have funeral and wedding dinners at Waffle House. It's just a thing here in the South. I saw a worker leave her post as a cashier to help a kid do his homework once. I saw another worker go into the back kitchen area and bring out a bottle of ketchup that was about to be thrown away. She asked the patron if he wanted to get some of it using a knife or something. The entire restaurant was out of ketchup, the manager had sent a kid to get some more, but the worker was like, "Let me see what I can do". This is the South. This is what I'm talking about. We are...all...Waffle House.  I'm going to put them in my next book. (Buy my books on Amazon. Jude Stringfellow.)

By the way, MY Waffle House is the "Airport" Waffle House on S. Meridian in OKC.

Photo Credit: Sander Baker OKC

Tech and I.

Technology and I don't always get along. I remember being about 24 or so and listening to my son's grandmother on his dad's side, say that she was just old enough not to have to put up with all the next tech coming out. She wasn't going to go out of her way to learn how to use a computer when the typewriter in her office worked just fine. She didn't want to have to be trained for a job she may only have for one or two more years before she retired. Over the next few years I watched her suffer and even be terminated by one employer for refusing to be trained to use their computer system. Her main complaint about it was that it was going to "take over the world" and I thought then she really sounded both old and pathetic. I was right, but now I'm that old and pathetic person.

    I grew up with amazing high-end tech on one hand, because my dad worked for Western Union, and they were partnered with AT&T and Bell Telephone, Southwestern Bell to be specific. He was privileged to learn things that were literally decades ahead of their time; people would never have been ready to accept what all he had his hands on in 1967! I remember sitting at a desk in his office and watching a "monitor" that looked like a stylized television set. He turned it on from another place in the office. His face appeared right in front of me. It wasn't television; it was intranet. It was being used by the military and some government offices. It was a big big secret. We could talk through a microphone to each other. That was so cool 

    He could also turn off the electricity in our house from the office. He could put in codes and numbers and do the same with anyone's house if he wanted to, but he told me that would be invading their privacy. It was, however, a trick the government or police could use in cases of emergency, such as when someone was robbing a bank and the vault had an electric latch! Can you imagine? Again, that was 1967. I was 5-6 years old and really learning stuff.  I wish I had stuck with it. I grew up and started forgetting stuff.

    Now, sometimes, not all the time, Tech and I have arguments. Usually, Tech wins and I have to use other Tech to find out what my problem is; sometimes I learn, and other times I cuss my head off, turn blue, spit, and scream until someone else comes to save my ass. It's just the way it is, and no, I won't apologize for it. I'm trying to do a better job with it. Let me give you an example or two.

    About four years ago now, I bought an Mp3 download of an LP from a guy in Scotland. I didn't know what I was doing, it wasn't opening. I wrote to him, and he tried to explain it, but whatever he was telling me to do, my computer just flat didn't have the same words, tabs, labels, whatever. Turns out I was using a newer version, and they didn't always have the same labels or locations for the means in which to find the data. He didn't know how to help; I didn't know how to just say OK, never mind. It took a few times before either of us realized the issue; and yeah, I felt really stupid. Then, because of the places I went to go find what I needed, I accidentally invited a hacker into the mix, and within minutes of me downloading the Mp3, $99 had been taken out of my PayPal account.

    The next day my bank called me to see if I had made a purchase of $99.00 from a person in the UK; I had not. I told them it was about $15.00, and they said that there were two transactions. I KNEW the man hadn't taken my money. I just knew he had not done that, so I wrote to him, letting him know what happened, and I showed him all the correspondence from my bank.  He was of course upset about it, thinking I was blaming him, but I wasn't. I swear, I was not. I just wanted to let him know if it was happening to me, it may be happening to others. 

    Well, he couldn't replicate it, and guess who was blamed....me. Turns out the bank investigated it and found that his site did have a problem in that it was attached to a crawler or something, and it came from his personal website. I sent the information to him again, he closed down the site, and he thanked me, but still, there was that underlining issue of him thinking I was blaming him when really, I was not. TECH bites.

    Then today, I was using my Word program to start a new book and on its own for NO REASON decided to not do page breaks. I could use the Show/Hide feature and see it, but it wasn't actually breaking like I like to see, which is literal space between pages! WHY? There was NO REASON for it. I had not gone into the program to change my preferences, but when I used Google to find answers it told me to go into my preferences. OK, where do I find those? I had to Google that too, and you guessed it, Windows 11 is different than other versions, so I'm over here cussing and swearing (screaming) that the directions online suck! They lie! They're full of shit! I was not nice. 

    I decided to be logical. I accepted the fact that Windows is a good program, but that the newer version had made changes I really can't understand or like. I thought about how I would VIEW the page, and it hit me; instead of going to the Layout page as was directed, I went to the View page and moved the cursor over the icon of the single page rather than where it had somehow been placed.  I now have my page breaks the way I like them, but the fact remains that the Google instructions for Windows 11 were not correct. This happens to me all the time. Someone on a video will assume I know where to go, they'll start their instruction and I'll be like "NO, I don't know where to find that page!! WAIT".  It's so dumb. So often, and so me.

    I try to breathe and think when Tech and I have these disagreements. I know Tech will win every last time, so I need to keep up with it. I realize that by not keeping up with it I will only suffer and cause others to suffer as well; that doesn't stop me from wanting someone much younger than I am to come along and help me. I gave birth for this VERY REASON!!  At least I know I have some help with Google if I can't find a kid willing to help me. Now that my grand are 10 and 12 years old I have an entire new generation of geeks to lean on, and that makes me really happy.

Photo Credit: The Economic Times