My Obsession with TSC.

     Some people have a hard time going into a bar and spending more than they should. It isn't uncommon for a few people I know to go into a bar, drop a $100 bill for a few drinks, and maybe a little something to eat. They'll stay two hours or so, and meet people, dance, and talk. They think it's worth it. They enjoyed themselves, and I would never tell them they shouldn't have fun.  Likewise, there are those who find going to the casinos more fun than going to a bar. They'll spend so much money trying to win so much more. I'm not into it, but hey, if they are, that's their gig.

    My obsession now, and I suppose it's an older one, is Tractor Supply.  I am that person who walks into the store thinking I'm picking up a bag of dog food, only to realize my horse may or may not need something. Usually, the horses don't need anything, but there I am looking up and down those aisles...you know, just in case.  I mosey past the car and truck stuff, not even thinking about what Stephen (my car) may want. I find myself in the clothing; I find myself thinking about boots. I could always use another pair of mucking boots, right? 😏

    I won't exit the building (usually) without dropping over $100 for feed, food, fleece, or footwear. Today, I was on a mission because the horses we rescued are coming tomorrow. They were going to come on Wednesday, just two more days away, but with the winter vortex hitting just north of the Oklahoma border, the hauler (a woman in Kansas) decided tomorrow would be better. It's OK, it saves me $60! I love saving money, but we weren't ready for them, and I needed to make a trip to my happy place.

    Since Laura won't let me lift anything, I engaged the help of a young worker named Bryan. He was truly a sweet, very cute kid, around 19 or 20. He told me he's not from our city, but goes to school and needed a job. He's driving farther to work than I would, but I think the Tractor Supply in his area was fully staffed, so he took a shift way out this way. He's like me; he can't break away from the words "on sale" or "clearance".  He told me Black Friday and Cyber Monday are his two favorite days of the year.

    I'm going to save up for next year's Black Friday special if it's anything like this year's special on ATVs. I could use a $3000 savings on a Gator! I think honestly, though, if I had to guess, I'd end up buying something used and keeping it on the farm rather than dumping a whole lot of money on a new vehicle. I can't see myself spending $6000 when $2000 will do the trick. It is fun to look though. I'll stick to my several bags of feed, dog food, cat food, litter, and that long-sleeved Carhartt T-shirt that I didn't need. You know I won't forget the pecan rolls, Charleston Chews, or Cow Tales. Nope, those are a staple.

    I like Tractor Supply a lot, but if my city had an Atwoods, I might switch loyalties. Not gonna say it loud or anything, but I could see that happening.  One of the great things about living on land and needing to fix something every week is that Tractor Supply is only 1/2 mile from me. If they don't have it and I'm forced to go to Atwoods, I only have 10.6 miles to go.  I can see myself doing it just to be doing it, if you want the truth. I could sneak over there, maybe pick up a sandwich at Earl's BBQ (Yukon), and make a day of it. I could swing by Ollie's too while I'm living large in the moment.

    People in El Reno like to say that folks who live in Yukon are rich and uppity. It isn't true; not for the most part, but it is fun to listen to the people talk about their neighbors the way they do. We came from Oklahoma City, another two cities west of Yukon, and I can tell you, not one of us ever thought those living in Yukon held a candle to what we had in the Big City. Still, it's fun to see the small-town rivalry extend beyond the football field into the streets and byways. I'm an El Reno Indian now. I've even got the T-shirt to prove it. I will take Jeannie to the game next fall too; she'll like that.

    Recently, my Tractor Supply addiction has forced me to pick up fencing supplies for both the horse and dog fences. I've got a co-worker helping Laura put up the two fences, and he's loving the freezing weather so much more than I would. You should have seen the restraint I had while walking through the store today, picking up the new 40-gallon rubber trough, feed, a few treats, medical aids for the horses, and an 80-foot garden hose. I did stop by the dog food, picked up a sack, and I did happen to get Laura her fix (the pecan rolls and Cow Tales), but I did not, did not, did not, purchase anything else -- I was so good!

Photo Credit: TractorSupply.com 

Differences and Challenges.

     Obviously, when you move to a new place, no matter where it is, or what the differences are regarding the type of housing, you're going to find that there are both good and bad differences, and even some that don't really fall into either of those two categories, but they are in fact differences. There will be challenges, good or bad. There is simply no way a person can move from one place to another without realizing that things will no longer be one way and that things are definitely another way, now that the move has taken place. We're in the middle of all that now.

    I'll start off slow and give you all the things that come to mind right off the top of my head; they may or may not mean much to you. This is my blog, and I'm writing it for my family and friends. If you're reading it and we're not related, you probably should go ahead and count yourself among my online friends. If I don't remember your birthday, I apologize.

    To start, the biggest difference is that I now live in a city of about 17,500 people, as opposed to 500,000. My old zip code had twice as many people as we do now.  You see it, and you feel it. You notice immediately that there aren't as many people driving around, roaming, or just in parking lots, stores, or on the streets. This means I can (and do) drive around without the noise, the loud booming music, the crazy drivers, etc. I love that.

    I pull into my drive and drive about a 1/4 of a city block before reaching my house. I literally lived on the street in the last house. There was the street, which was busy all the time, and then there was a curb, a three-foot sidewalk, and another four or five feet before you reached the edge of my porch. That is not the case now. My mailbox is about a football field length from my house. The one in the city was on the house.  I pull into a garage now, not a carport, and no one is inside my garage when I do. There have been times when the homeless and just passersby would be standing in my carport, which is upsetting at best. 

    The dogs aren't barking as much because they're still cooped up inside the house at this point, but when they do go outside (when the fence is up), they'll be able to bark to their hearts' desire. They can bark and bark, and then, if they want to, they can keep on barking. We were tattled on at the old place and received a warning from the city. We bought shock collars, and we monitored how long the dogs could stay outside. If they barked through the high-pitched sirens on the collars, we brought them in immediately. We can't afford $170 fines! That will not happen where we live now.

    We have carpet in the bedrooms. I'm OK with it, but I will have to watch the dogs as they tend to think it's a softer place to squat when they haven't been walked enough. We need to get that fence up as quickly as possible. It's going up this week.  We love the color of the new carpet; it's between silver and grey. The hardwood flooring is nice throughout the rest of the house, and with the living space being so much bigger than it was in the last house, we see a lot of it. The living room is literally twice as large as it was before.

    Laura is using the dining space as her office. She really couldn't do that in the other house. It wasn't set up correctly and had both an opening to the living area and a side or front door, depending on which side of the house you considered the front or side. She's able to set up her little space the way she wants, and in time we'll wall it off to give her even more privacy. This is such a good thing. She's already opening up and enjoying herself like she hasn't in several years.  I like seeing her this happy.

    We have a real working fireplace. It's gas, which isn't my favorite, but as soon as it is serviced this week, we can use it. We haven't had one. We had a fireplace in the apartment for 9 years, but were unable to use it because the complex never had it serviced. This is a great addition to our happier mental selves, as we plan to use it often. You know Laura will make me watch a few YouTube videos first, but we'll get it done. What in the world did we do before YouTube? I guess we just figured things out on our own. God forbid! 😆

    Our kitchen is larger here. It has a Maytag dishwasher that works. It has a little more storage space, but the big news is that my dad made the cabinets many years ago, and just knowing that makes this place all the more dear to my soul and helps me to cope with just about anything that is out there to bother me. He made mostly great decisions, so I lean into those memories when I'm in the kitchen, the bathroom, and even the hallway because there are vanities and a gun cabinet that he made as well. The other house was nice, but nothing can compare to what your dad makes.

    Last thing for now, we have horses. We haven't had them at our own place since October 2012. We owned a 25-acre place with a really bad house for about three months until we couldn't close because it was just so bad. It didn't and would never have passed inspection. We kept the horses, but had to board. We have always boarded, and it's always been damned expensive. It's still expensive; don't get me wrong. We're paying more for this place than we have ever paid before, but when you consider that I'm paying a normal price for the house and what I would have to pay for board, we're good.

    We have 14 acres, of which we can use 9.2.  We can have 6 or 7 horses if we want, but we'll just have our two and Laura will quarantine four more for the county, and earn a little money to help offset the costs.  We could never have done that before. We can walk out the back door and see our horses soon. They arrive on Wednesday.  She's always loved horses, as I have, but she has a deeper and more spiritual connection with them. Having them outside will not only help her mentally but also boost her spirit and give her many more reasons to work out physically. This is her time to shine. We have only God to thank, and we do.

    There you have it. There are tons more things to discuss and so many observations to go over. We have a few nut and fruit trees in the yard. We'll have to find someone to cut the hay-grass in the spring, but we're just so blessed and happy to be where we are. We're genuinely hoping to be here until Jesus returns. If that happened today, we would not complain. If He waits, we will not complain...too much.

Photo Credit: Me. (Jace, my Paint mare)

Black Friday and Me.

     I have so many memories of not shopping on Black Friday, just because when we were growing up, my mother didn't want us to be hurt by all the "crazy mothers" out there who push through the throngs of people to pick up whatever doorbuster was on sale. It would have been Sears, Montgomery Wards, or maybe even TG&Y, but even back in the day, my mom was concerned about all the would-be dangers that could happen to any one of us four kids. She was also not going to place herself at risk. I remember that. It stuck in my brain, so when I grew up and could make decisions for myself, I was leery of going to any store that advertised 'too-amazing-to-be-true' sales on Black Friday.

    One Black Friday in particular, which I do remember, happened about ten years ago. Jeannie and I went to Target after all the early bird specials. We weren't going into the store to get presents for ourselves or anyone. We were going to get her hair gel, and I think I wanted cat litter or something. What we were purchasing isn't the reason I remember the event. About an hour after we had shopped, I was notified by my bank that someone had tried to use my credit card. Because it was after 5:00 p.m., the bank was closed, and this was long before banks could print another card. I lost the use of my only means of paying for anything - and  I lost it for a week!

    I had to drive to the bank to withdraw money, and I was only allowed to withdraw $300 a day. I had bills to pay, but no checks. The bank gave me desk checks, and I had to write my name, address, and phone number on each one. One was rejected, and it was just such a hassle! Times have changed, and I'm so grateful for that. Recently, after a fraud notice, my bank "captured" my card, but I was able to drive to the branch and get another card with a different number immediately. It was still a hassle, but nowhere near as inconvenient as it was that Black Friday weekend.

    I think I may have purchased one big-ticket item on Black Friday while in a store on that day, and my memory wants to say it was a television. I just don't go into department stores on that day. It would have been in the late 1990s. I'm not pulling the complete memory out of my head at the moment, but I will say that since the invention of the internet, I have faithfully watched the uploaded "crazy mother" videos that show way too much open hostility. It's calmed down a lot since the invention of online shopping, but it's still a treat to watch the funny crazies out there pulling each other's hair out to get the last big whatever is reduced to a ridiculous price.

    This year, because I could and really wanted one, I bought a countertop air fryer-toaster oven that also bakes. It's a Hamilton Beach model, and it has all the bells and whistles I need. I think Laura and I will use it more than we will our conventional oven. I bought it online (Amazon). Their Black Friday specials started this past Monday. It's easier to use, uses less energy, and is compact, fitting perfectly in our new kitchen. I did get it on a Black Friday special, but it's still Thanksgiving, so I'm not sure if that counts as cheating.  I don't think it is. I waited for it to go on sale rather than buying it before we moved. I saved about $27 by waiting.

    Walmart does have them, but only 2 are in stock, and their Black Friday price was higher than Amazon's. I'm not driving to the store, waiting in line before dawn to get the thing. Nope. I ordered it, and I'll wait for it to be delivered on Monday. I'm OK waiting for it. We have our menus planned out for the weekend. I will say this: shopping in-store on Black Friday is still not going to happen. Jeannie is coming over tomorrow, and we'll go to Walmart if she wants to, but I'm not using my card. I know it's not the same, and I know that fraud or security measures are so much better now, but I don't care. If we don't need to go, we don't need to go. 

    I don't think we'll get a discount at our favorite Mexican restaurant, but you just never know. They may have a special. It's worth checking it out, and unlike the lines in Oklahoma City today for an open restaurant, all of our food places in this city are generally uncrowded and just waiting for you to walk through their doors! I love this place. 

Photo Credit: Walmart.com

Thankful!

     Yes, we're in the new house, and it's Thanksgiving!  So, besides my birthday, which was the 22nd and the day we actually moved a lot of the stuff into the house, this is the first real holiday.  We've been here a few days and nights, but Laura and I both feel that it's still unbelievable that we are really here. It just doesn't seem real to us yet. It will, but right now we're dealing with putting everything away and finding the right spot for things.  It hasn't sunk in that we're here for the long, long, long haul, and that as time goes by, we'll add this fence, that addition, etc.  We're making all sorts of plans, but will likely have to wait until late spring to do most of the projects.

    Moving at the end of fall and/or start of winter puts a damper on the plans for improvements. She's putting up the horse fence today and tomorrow, then the dog fence. We were going to do it the other way around, but it didn't work out that way.  She's just doing a 60x60 paddock right now, and then, again, in the spring, we'll do more fencing to allow the horses to roam. We'll take them on walks until then. In winter, they may not want to walk much. We wanted to use the shed we have for protection, but that's not going to happen. It isn't safe without making drastic repairs, and to be honest, we don't want to do that. We'd rather save up, tear it down, and build them another one.

    This winter, they'll be covered in blankets and protected by the two trees. The shed does provide a block for the wind, so they can use it that way. In the spring, we'll demolish the big structure and put up either a double loafing shed or two smaller sheds - one for each horse. (Mine will be a double as my horse is having a baby in the spring as well.)  This is yet another thing to be thankful for. We'll find a way to block off the weather - probably using pipes and tarps, but it will be done.

    There are just too many things to be thankful for to name them here in the blog. I couldn't start without stating shamelessly and unequivocally that Jesus is the reason for all of my happiness, my joy, and, of course, my gratitude. He truly has been so very wonderful in making all the tiny pieces fit together that had to come together for Laura and me to get this house. We wanted it. We saw it, and we wanted it. We began praying, asking God if it was His will, and if so, we'd like to have it. We asked him to literally open every single door to make the process happen -- we should have asked Him to make the process easy, too!! (It wasn't)

    Now that we are here, we're gearing up for the horses' arrival next week. We're gearing up for winter and need to weatherize the windows with draft stoppers. This place has a lot of thin windows. We're looking forward to making chili, soups, and good hot meals for the season. We're looking forward to Christmas, the changes that are bound to be plenty. We're so excited about the little things as well as the bigger things. We're learning every day what it's like to own a home rather than rent one. Just today, we had to put off hooking up the washing machine until we figure out how to stop the cold water valve from dripping! 

    We're super excited about this being our first Thanksgiving in the house. We're not making a big dinner; in fact, I'm going to the city to eat with Reuben and his kids. We're meeting up at Golden Corral. Laura is exhausted and wants to save her energy for the horse fencing. We just put the kitchen boxes away this morning, so no, we weren't prepared to cook and have a big meal yet. It will happen. We're thankful for the bigger kitchen. We're thankful for the dishwasher!! We'll use it too, just as soon as I go to the store and pick up some dishwashing tabs for the machine!  😁

UPDATE: Reuben and I ended up going to our favorite Indian restaurant in OKC rather than fighting the lines at Golden Corral. I'm telling you, restaurants really should stay open on holidays, if they can. There were so many people standing outside of Golden Corral waiting for folks to get in, eat, and get out. There was even a man standing in the parking lot with a sign that read "Please be considerate of others, do not stay at your table when you have finished eating."  There was at least a two or even three-hour wait. No, thank you. There is nothing in that restaurant worth that sort of wait. We had his kids, too, so that wouldn't have happened even if we were willing.

    The Indian restaurant served really good food, and they were so kind. We were followed in by a dozen or so others. We had plenty of space, plenty of food, and we were able to stay at the table and talk without feeling rushed. I love the place - and if that ends up being a family tradition, I wouldn't complain.

Photo Credit: Pinterest.com

Did the Math!

     I did the math. I don't always do Math. In fact, to me, Math is a four-letter word, and I choose not to use it most of the time. I will refer to it if needed. Today, is one of those times when doing the math actually paid off. I may do it again if I keep getting these types of results.  I typically shop for food online at Kroger because I lived in the city, and not just in the city, but in the center of the city, and the grocery stores near me were always crowded and not with the most favorable people. I didn't feel all that safe.

    Not only did I not feel safe in the stores, but I also hated parking far enough away so that people didn't ding my car, scratch it, key it, or just walk by and kick it for no reason. No, I didn't live in Hell; it was Oklahoma City, but it's becoming increasingly bad; the behavior of the younger set has become outrageously dangerous in some cases, and just overall uncomfortable. I had to move, so I did. Now that I'm in a much smaller city, I can (and I will) shop at the stores instead of ordering online, and here's why.

    Kroger Delivery is a great place to shop. It truly is. It has just about everything you can imagine, but it is, if you can imagine, a little more expensive than a Walmart Superstore. Not only will I save on the overall costs, I won't have to tip the driver $10 each time they come out -- which was about 3 times a month, so $30 a month, is in and of itself worth going to the store myself as long as I feel safe and I don't have to stand in a long unmoving line to get to the cashier who could really care less if you're there or not. This was the experience I had over and over again in the "Big City" Walmart or just about anywhere I shopped except maybe Trader Joe's, but that's a whole other story, right there.

    I did the math. I went to Walmart in my fair city today, and I bought $77.63 (after tax) worth of food. I didn't buy anything that wasn't edible. I did this on purpose to make a true comparison.  I drove home, unpacked my food, sat down at this very computer, and pulled up the Kroger website. I entered literally every item I had purchased earlier, and if I couldn't find the exact thing, I found the closest match. I was trying to be as fair as possible. When the total was tallied, the Kroger price tag was $90.78, and that doesn't include the $10 tip I gave the driver. So...$100.78 - $77.63 = $23.15, and we'll round it up to about a 22-23% difference.

    At Kroger, I am at their mercy as to whether they have something I ordered or if they have to substitute. I suppose the same thing can happen at another store, but I'm the one who makes the substitution if I choose to. Also, I pick out my own produce, which I will say, Kroger has always done a great job. Still, 22% over time is a big savings. I'm going to enjoy not shopping for groceries online, and because the stores here are rarely crowded, I'll be in and out with ease. Another thing, and this is huge, at Kroger, because they have refrigerated trucks to bring your food to you, the bread can become wet from condensation; ick!

    I'm not a huge fan of shopping for food now. I used to love it. I used to live for it, but now I'm more or less just ready to order it online and be done with it. Maybe being at a great store and with less drama while shopping, I'll begin to love it again. It gets me out of the house and allows me to walk more. I'm doing the steps again - not up to 10,000 or anything like that yet, but I am mobile again, and that makes a huge difference in my overall attitude and my physical well-being. Gotta keep moving...moving...moving...at least that's what I'm told.

    Another thing, and this has nothing to do with food prices. I am going to buy a toaster oven thingy that is an air fryer and all sorts of things. It's a Hamilton Beach product, and at Walmart, it is $77, but online at Amazon, because they have to deliver it, even though I pay for Prime, it's $89.  So that's another 14% savings, and it's the very same thing. No difference whatsoever except I have to get into my car and go get it - which I'll be out and about anyway, so why not? I'm thinking I'm going to buy a lot less online at Amazon now that I live in a little town with a great store.

    Walmart is not the only place to shop in my town. I don't want you to think that. There are three larger grocery stores, actually, two Dollar Generals, and a host of Mom & Pop shops that rival anything you can find on Etsy. This place is amazing. Because it's off I-40, there are a lot of little, cute shops for the passing-through visitors, and some amazing restaurants too. We have nearly every fast food chain of course, they line up around the highway. We have dozens of small, quaint, and robust joints that serve every imaginable kind of cuisine. We're the last stop as you leave Oklahoma City before you hit the wastelands -- people stop to fuel up and get what they need for the road. Because it's on Route 66, there's always something memorable to buy or give as a gift.

    So, having done the math, having put the pencil to it, I can say that I'm looking forward to saving about $100 a month on food and close to another $100 on products I found online that I didn't want to go into the Big City stores to search for. I don't go to malls anymore, but believe it or not, I don't really need to. I don't miss it.  One thing that hasn't changed since I moved to the smaller city is the internet - it's the exact same price, so no savings there.  Dog food was cheaper here - I forgot to mention that. Walmart and Sam's Club are supposed to be around the same cost, but believe it or not, the wet food I buy for Ginger is $3.49 cheaper where we live now! Woot!

    I guess what I'm saying is, I'm looking forward to being here and more so now than I was before. I was super happy to be moving here -- and now that I'm here, I'm so very happy to be so, and no, I don't think I'll make another move anytime soon. Nope...not unless it's straight up in the air!

 

Photo Credit: Pinterest.com

We Made It!! (Thank You, Jesus)

     Laura and I are safe and sound in our new house. We are 100% in the house and will spend the next few days unpacking and putting everything in its rightful place. I'm so grateful for Laura's great help, and for my son Jon and his friend Juan!! Everyone did just an amazing job!! I had the easy part; I only had to pay for it, but I did drive the 10-foot truck back and forth one time on Friday. Jon drove the larger one on Sunday. We used Saturday to rest, relax, put things away, and break down a few boxes to take back to the old house to load up again. Now, we have about 30 good boxes to give away. I'll put them on the Facebook page (our city has a couple) and see if anyone needs 30+ good boxes. They'll have to buy tape for the tops.

    OK, so we're in, and we've slept a couple of nights here. We slept here on my birthday, Saturday night, and it was awesome to be in the house that day. We ordered the truck around noon on Friday and kept it until noon Saturday. I went with U-Haul, as I always do. They've just always been so reliable. I went 54 miles, and the 10-footer cost me $121. I put $12 of gas in it and only used about $9, but I wanted to bring it up to the mark, so I wouldn't be charged. The 15-footer cost $141 after all was said and done, and Jon ended up putting more gas in it than he needed. The man at the store claimed it was full, but it was only 3/4 full -- dog gone it!

    It's really important to check the tires, take photos of all the corners and sides of the truck, and check the gas level. Both Jon and I forgot, but he put in a lot of gas, and it wasn't full. I told him I only spent $9 on my trip, which was the same distance as his. The clerk obviously misrepresented the gas level. The kind people at U-Haul trusted me; they only charged me what I should have been charged, and I'll take Jon out for a big, fat, hefty burger when he comes out to see me next time. That should make up for it! He's such a great man. I really love him. 

    Juan works with Jon, and he couldn't have picked a better guy to come out to help. Juan took every tiny thing, big thing, bulky thing, and put them into place like a puzzle. That truck was absolutely full, and we didn't need to make more than one trip for the big things (furniture and appliances mainly).  Laura did the same thing with the smaller truck. I just wound her up and watched. She put it all together, and basically, I just assisted. GREAT help. Could not have been better -- and God was so very gracious to hold off His rain until the very last minute. So good.

    We're slowly moving things around, unpacking, placing, deciding where things go. Laura hooked up my computers, and she has been deciding where everything will go in each room since I have to work and don't have time to do it.  I will say this: I would SO much rather work than move again. Yes, I told my boss, I will take working over moving any and every day! He agreed with me. Two other co-workers moved this past weekend as well. It must be time of year to move to a new house! All of us went from renting to owning -- very nice.

    I just bought a bunch of fencing at Tractor Supply -- Laura is going to put up a horse fence now. She is doing the horse fence first, and then the dog fence. It won't be as big as we will do it later, but it will give the dogs a place to go and have fun outside, as well as a place to do their business. Right now, we're having to walk them, and that's not a lot of fun, really. The first day, we got up at 4:10 a.m. to do it, that's for someone else -- not me. I'm not good at getting back to sleep once I get out of bed. It's all good. We'll make it all happen -- God has made it all happen. So super happy right now.

    I probably won't use Kroger delivery as much now; we have a really good and almost empty Walmart. We have a United Supermarket as well, and I can't wait to see how their prices compare. I think I'm going to actually save money living in our new city. Several items on my Kroger list are at least 15-20% lower at Walmart -- this could be a game changer. Also, if I can get something at Walmart as opposed to Amazon, I'll do that as well. I didn't do it in the big city because the place was always so crowded, ugly, and the energy was terrible. Here, we literally see a few people each time we go - maybe 50 in the entire store, and that includes the workers!

    Pulling into my garage, closing the door, and hearing it shut makes all the difference to me. I've not had that in over 10 years. Washing dishes in a dishwasher is nice too, and ours is a Maytag. We didn't have a dishwasher, washer, dryer, or doorbell at the apartments. We did have a washer and dryer at the house, but not a garage or doorbell!  I go outside sometimes and just ring it to ring it -- I'm like that. One funny thing, and then I'll let you go. My bedroom door doesn't shut all the way. That's hilarious because in a number of places I've lived, it's always been my bedroom door that has had an issue with properly closing. Geez!

Photo Credit: Me

Good Plans - Real Outcome.

    So, yes, it should have happened, but it didn't happen. Then, when it did happen, it still didn't happen.  Crazy, yes. I'll explain.  Laura and I were supposed to drive out to our new city to pick up the keys to the new house, and I was to write the check for the first month.  The plan was to take a carload of stuff with us, pick up the keys, shake hands with the previous owners and their realtor, and set off the bug bombs before we left. We were then going to drive home, rest, and wait for the morning so we could pick up the big truck, bring it home, load it up, take it back to the new house, and be done. Again, that didn't happen.

    I took off work at 2:00 p.m. as planned, but God had other plans for us. He had heavy thunderstorms planned, so our trip to the new place didn't happen until this morning. We were supposed to meet our realtor with the others at 10:00 a.m., and, of course, she texted to say she'd be late, so we were just to sort of talk until she arrived. THAT, also, didn't happen. The best-made plans are not always going to come to fruition. It's just the way it is.

    We got up, ate breakfast, drove 26 miles west, met the people sans my realtor, and, even though I had met the owners just weeks ago, he didn't recognize me when I came through the door. He couldn't recall who I was! Hello, I'm buying your damn house!  I had to tell him who I was again, and I introduced Laura to him and his wife. Their realtor had Googled me; she had seen my website, so she knew exactly who I was. She was even asking me to give her signed copies of my books. (I'm nice, I did that. I shouldn't have, but I'm really rather ...no, I'm too nice.)

    Before my realtor arrived, the owner (the man, not the woman) began telling me how things would go. He had demands, and I was going to do exactly what he wanted. I almost laughed, but contained myself. I simply said no. I reminded him that we have a lease-to-purchase agreement he can't get out of; I will live in my house the way I choose. He said he was keeping a set of keys. I did laugh then because I knew I was changing the locks.  He started reminding me that he still owned the house; I reminded him that he needed to read the contract. That's when his realtor stepped in. She told him to settle down. His wife was oblivious; she was never involved to begin with. 

    I signed the check and handed it to him. Told him I would mail the checks to him monthly, as the contract states, but he tried to say he would come by to pick them up. No, he won't. FHA requires six months of on-time lease payments before giving me my down payment, but the contract is irreversible unless I breach it, and I'm not about to breach it. Call me stubborn, I know, it's not only true, it's very true. I am also obstinate and rude sometimes, and if you push, trying to corner me, you'll realize that my bite is much worse than my bark. He came very close to finding that out - but I wouldn't want him to think he had the upper hand, so I just smiled.

    Anyone who knows about a Southern woman knows exactly what happens after she smiles and goes silent. She'll ice you over quicker than a llama can spit. He knew; his wife knew, and the realtor, very smartly, suggested we hold off on our conversations until my realtor could arrive. She wasn't wrong. I texted Amanda, asking her if she was close -- telling her "these people are stupid". She got the text and stated she was minutes away. Thank God.

     In just another minute, that old man had gone from zero to 90 again when I suggested their realtor take her sign out of the front yard. The house was no longer for sale. "The hell it isn't," He started. "You ain't bought it yet. If I can find someone to pay me cash, that's what I'm doing." He seemingly let someone's cat out of the bag!  If Amanda had been in the house, his realtor wouldn't have allowed him to talk. He stormed out of the house, and she apologized for him, saying she'd known him for 40 years and that he could get hot. I don't care -- he's a rude son of a bitch and needs to realize when he sells a house, it's no longer his. We have a contract! He was under the impression that until I closed it was still up for sale. That is not the case!  I can't help it if both he and his realtor are ignorant of the laws.

    I gave their realtor a stone-hard stare. She couldn't have missed my meaning. The second Amanda walked through the doors, and after the hugs, I told her straight what they had just stated. Her assurances were warranted and appreciated. The house is mine; it's under contract, and as long as I uphold my end, it's safe.

     Not to be rude, or maybe a little rude, their old realtor is climbing the age ladder herself, around mid-70s. She doesn't use modern technology; her email is an AOL account, and she prints everything off to be signed. Needless to say, we were held back more than a half dozen times in the process because her toner ran out, or she couldn't find the keys to her office to reach the printer!

    This has been an uphill battle from the get-go, but it's been made so much worse because not only are the owners clueless (when I say that, I mean that my realtor had to point out to them and their realtor that the survey showed they owned 14 acres of land, not 7. They were trying to sell me a random plot of land that wasn't surveyed. They genuinely did not know they owned 14 acres of land. They believed it was 7.) they are ignorant to laws, methods, procedures, and just standards! Their old realtor was so out of date and out of touch with new methods that my realtor had to tell her, remind her, and show her the new laws over and over again. It was a nightmare dealing with both of them.

    If we hadn't really wanted the house and land, we would have just found something else. From the moment Amanda called their realtor, she knew she'd have to fight the whole way through. The old gal hadn't used anything digital; she was all paper and pens. I'd be stunned if she had a smartphone.  Amanda would schedule something, and their realtor would try to fit it into her 10-4 p.m. hours, Monday through Friday. She couldn't be bothered. We were pushed back, and pushed back a number of times, because she hadn't told her clients about the new plans or taken the file to them to review or sign. She gave them three days to consider our offer! THREE DAYS!

    Anyway, needless to say, we didn't get to the U-Haul to pick up the truck until an hour after our scheduled time. We were OK, but exhausted from the stress of that old man and their old realtor, who couldn't bring themselves to face 2025! He was under the impression that women needed a man - he said so. He asked me why I wasn't married. He asked me if I had been married. I didn't answer; his realtor shut him down. She wasn't too much better, however, telling Laura, "Your momma would get more flies with honey than she would with vinegar," to which Laura smiled and retorted, "My mom would rather kill the flies."

    We picked up the truck and brought it home. Laura loaded it, stuffing it full. We'll take it out to the new place in the morning and return it. We'll do a load or two with the car and bring the animals home. Then, just because we can, and because he was available, we will pick up our new tuxedo cat. He's three months old, and he already lives in our city. He's being fostered after being surrendered to the shelter. He's black and white, and Laura named him Pippin. I think we're full now; four dogs, three cats, and two horses. That'll just about do it.

    Just because plans didn't work out the way we thought they would doesn't mean we're not on track. We are rested now, and we've got work to do - but we'll do it with a happier spirit tomorrow. It's my birthday, for one thing, and it's a Saturday. My fridge is being delivered, Laura and I will eat a good lunch somewhere, and we'll just have a great day -- when we bring that truck back and clean the old house, we'll be 80% done. Sunday, Jon brings the big stuff -- and we wipe the baseboards, check the rooms one last time, and surrender the keys to the little slot in the wall at the Lake Stella office - and be done.

    Ten years in one place is a good record for anyone. We have both enjoyed and appreciated our time here. The complex has been around since the 1970s. I've lived in it several different times in my life. It was the first apartment for all of my kids; they've been in their own units as well. This last stint with Laura and I was 8.5 years in one upstairs 2 bed and 1.5 years in the only house in the complex. It's been good - but it's time to move on -- past time.

Photo Credit: Lone Star Art

Anticipation!!

     You talk about patience; I am learning it. I don't like it, either. I really don't get along with having to wait for something. It's just not my strong suit. I can do other things so much better than just sit around and wait for the clock to tick its way over to the time I need or want it to be.  When you have to use all your fingers and toes to count off the days until something happens, you may as well just wait until you only need one hand or one foot to do the counting. I hate waiting. My birthday is November 22, so around Halloween I start saying it's soon - and then I realize I have three full weeks to go! 

    Well, I have four days to go now!! Only four days until my birthday, but I only have to wait two days (less than that since it's nearly 6:30 p.m. on Tuesday) before Laura and I take full possession of our new house. We just can't wait -- but we have to wait!! It is just not easy to do.  We'll only drive out to the place on Thursday to pay for the down and get the keys. We're not moving into it until the next day. We're going to set off bug bombs, and we'll make sure it's all locked up before we kiss the house good night and return early the next day (Friday) with the first of two big loads.

    Talk about anticipation! We've been dealing with it for weeks now. We have 94% of everything in boxes and bags just waiting to be loaded into the big truck. We started weeks ago, doing just a bit now and then, and then we upped our game and put in more each passing day. We boxed, we labeled, we moved the boxes into the dining area, and began the collection process. Now, three weeks later, and with only 2 days to go, we've got just about everything in the same spot - waiting. Just waiting. Our computers are still up, and the desks, of course. I have to work right up to the last minute.

    The kitchen is packed. The living room is packed, but the big stuff goes on Sunday. The office is packed, and the bathrooms and bedrooms are packed. We are just so ready.  We even went out to eat tonight, so we didn't have to pull out dishes and silverware. We're in the groove!!  It's not just our house we're dealing with; we have horses coming to live with us in two weeks. That's gonna take a little planning as well.

    I have to buy the fence materials, and Laura has to put the dang thing up. I get off easy; I'd so much rather pay for it than build it. Laura's OK with the arrangement as well. She's been out of practice for ranch-style living. She's biting at the bit (to use an appropriate term) to get started on all this good ol' country living.  The fence is the first real piece of it. She's only putting in a couple of lines and a gate, but she's looking forward to it. 

    We've been to Tractor Supply online to do the shopping and put everything we need into the cart. We'll hit "pay" on the 20th and get that part of it started. They'll deliver the materials on the 22nd, and she'll start the process. We could bring most of it home in the car, but if they're willing to bring it out, we're willing to let them. The 8-foot gate, wire, six-foot t-posts, and wooden posts need a truck to do it right; no sense looking like idiots carrying that sort of thing in my little car.

    When the horses arrive, I won't see much of Laura for a few weeks, months, or even a full year if I know her like I think I know her. Sure, she'll have a job too, but the second she's off the clock, she's barn-bound, and she'd sleep there if I didn't force her to come into the house to protect me. I use that as an excuse, you know; I tell her she has to come into the house after 10 pm so I'm not here by myself.  She threatened to take me shooting again and to buy me another dog so she can stay out in the barn a little longer. I may let her if it's a Dachshund Beagle puppy.

    My horse, Jace, and her horse, Lady Sif, are safe now from the Kill Pen and waiting for us in quarantine up in Kansas. The man there is charging $15/day per horse for them to be there. We'll charge the same when she gets her place set up. She's decided to keep 2-4 horses on one section of the land to bring in enough to pay her portion of the mortgage. That girl's a thinker! As long as we still have 6-7 acres to ride on, I'm OK with her side hustle. She'll enjoy watching over other people's horses and making sure they get the care they deserve. She'll do it her way and not have to ask anyone else for permission. That's the #1 thing about this place - it is OURS.

    We did find out today who it is that is moving into our little rented house. I say little, it's the same size as our new house, but it's just not ours. We found out it's an old neighborhood acquaintance we used to live next door to. We lived next door to that family for eight years. I couldn't be happier for them; they deserve to be able to spread out and give their two kids a nice yard to play in and their own bedrooms. That'll make their Christmas so much more enjoyable than it has ever been. I'm super excited about that.

    As for us? Well, we're already planning that holiday too. We've got a fireplace with a mantel. We've got a big open window with an amazing view out onto the horses and our acreage. We'll line the windows with lights, decorate the big fake tree, and put bells and silly "ears" on the dogs. The cats really don't like our silliness, but they do tolerate us during this time of the year. Ginger has earned the right to watch more than to participate. She turned 13 on the 9th. We will celebrate her birthday on my birthday this year, so we can do it together in the new house. She didn't argue when I suggested it.

Photo Credit: Me.  Ginger pup.

    

Black Friday 2025!

     This month, the month of November, is my very favorite month of the year. It's not only my birthday month, but it's the month we celebrate Thanksgiving, and then we get great shopping values on Black Friday. That's right, I'm a big-time Black Friday fan. I don't, however, buy silly items that just happen to be flashy or have a reduced price. I also never stood in line waiting for doors to open, so I could fight my way through a throng of people to get to the big ticket items at the department stores. Nope, not me. I'm the one watching those idiots on live YouTube feeds. I will say, however, that since the invention of online shopping, there has been a dramatic drop in those types of vicious and videoed encounters. 

    Black Friday for me has not always been a pleasant experience. I had $$$ stolen from my credit card one year (at Target). I try really hard not to get out on that day to do any real shopping. I have been known to run to the grocery store for this or that, but I do my pre-holiday shopping long before Black Friday, usually, and even when it wasn't a cool thing to do, I shopped the clearance aisles for gifts throughout the year. That way, I could stash a gift in a box and forget about it, making it just as exciting when I open the box again, wrap it, and give it away. (Sorry, but I'm not going to get a black eye buying my friends or family something I could buy the week after Christmas the year before and just keep it under wraps!) I've worked this system for ages.

    Online shopping sales started this week for their annual "Pre-Black-Friday" sales. I think I'm catching on to how this game is played. I keep an eye on the clearance tab on Amazon just because, and when I see something at another store, or on another site, I check to see if Amazon has it. I've tried using the Capital One shopping gizmo as well, but I'm not convinced it's helped more than a tiny fraction in costs, and I'm not going to download their extension on my computer; nope.  So, it's Amazon to the rescue for me.

    This year, because I needed one and wanted one, I have kept my eye out for a good, manually operated recliner that is a name brand, of good quality, has lots of reviews, and those reviews must have a minimum 4-star rating. I have a budget, and I keep that in mind as well.  When I found exactly what I wanted today, I nabbed it. I didn't care if it was going to be delivered in 3 weeks; that doesn't bother me. I'm good with that, actually, but it is being delivered by Amazon - for FREE. They, and a handful of others, were willing to do that. Most places charge around $150 for delivery and setup. (Amazon is only going to leave it outside the garage.) Laura and I will have to use the dolly to pull the chair inside. We can do that.

    Signature Design by Ashley has always been a good brand. I've always had good experiences, and I assume others have, given that the rating was over 4 stars and the reviews reached the 23,000 mark - a good sign. JC PENNEY had it for $599 but $150 delivery. Wayfair had it for $549, and the delivery cost was $129. Amazon had it for $408 and free delivery! The only caveat was, it was dark brown. Oh no, dark brown? Really? Damn! Good thing my favorite color of all time is DARK BROWN!  I'm good. I bought it. Merry Christmas to me.

    We're moving the week before Thanksgiving, and my computer will be set up and ready to go, tuned in to some real-time hot and heavy fights over the latest and greatest electronic gizmos that Walmart has to offer. I'm done with gizmos. Give me a comfortable chair anytime. What would I stand in line for? A metal grab bar for the tub. Yes, you know you're old when you're shopping for one of those babies. Not the suction cup type; no, I want a good sturdy (very functional) type. I bet I can find one -- and I'll have my new handy-dandy handyman put it in for me. I haven't told you about him yet, but I will. I'm just waiting to get his permission to do so! 

    I have Laura to pop open jars and assemble the furniture pieces, but a good handyman is quite useful. I'll keep you posted. So far, we've charged him with building the dog fence, clearing out the barn, and taking the barn's awning and back panels off. He may pull the storm shelter out of the ground later in the early spring and fill up the hole with whatever he can find. I told him I'd stay quiet if he had a few bodies he needed to hide -- he laughed.

Less Than a Week!! (Gettin' Real)

     I woke up this morning, and I wasn't in my new house. It won't be that way next weekend. Next weekend I will wake up and be in my new house, on my new property, and I'll be surrounded by boxes and stuff; a lot of stuff! We're moving the stuff we can move by ourselves on Friday, and spending the night at the new place. Our last night in the old place will be on the floor as well, as Laura will break down the beds and have the frames ready for packing as soon as we can get up and around. We have plans! I think my plans are earlier than hers. 

    Laura isn't known for waking up early - she wasn't that kid who dragged me out of bed on Christmas morning. Nope, if left up to her, we'd be the last family on the planet to open presents if it meant she could sleep in a little longer. I will roll out of my bed around 8, and she'll open her eyes around 10. That's not the same thing as accomplishing tasks. It just means she's awake. We'll pick up the truck around 11 and load it for an hour or so, and take it out, unload it, and be done around 3 or 4. We'll take another load by car. That load will be the animals and whatever we can stuff in the trunk. 

    As it's becoming increasingly real by the day, I decided to take another trip out to El Reno today to see the place, just to confirm it's still there, you know. I was extremely happy to see the locate marks and flags that showed us where the facilities are. We're installing our fence from the 22nd through the 25th, or so. We don't want to drive a T-post in the ground and hit an underground facility. If that happens, I'll have to call Laura in six months or so and demand that she pay my company -- it's what I do. I don't want to call my kid for failure to use due care, but I will.

    I visited my favorite bargain store today and purchased a pair of end tables. They're new too. The bargain store has a mix of older items, similar to a thrift shop, and also offers a selection of new things. I spoke with the owners today about it; they told me they go to sales and clearance events to get things. The tables, however, belong to a guy in the area. He bought them and put them together, and then decided they were too small for what he wanted. My gain! He's happy because he got what he paid for them. I'm happy because they were already put together. It was worth the extra bit for that!

    I bought my refrigerator from the bargain store, and I found some new oven mitts and towels I'll pick up next week when I go in to get the little tables. I'm leaving them there until I move. That's another thing; the people are so good about things like that - they're not charging me storage. I love this place. I already love the people. I love that it's so quiet and nothing is happening. Many people might find it boring, but I find it lovely. Nothing means I can breathe, relax, move around, rest, and not be worried, bothered, or interrupted. I love boring.

    I went to Walmart again; I never go to the one in the city. I will go a lot in the smaller city because I'll get my steps in, and there's virtually no one there. I think maybe 50 people, if I had to call them all into one spot. That includes the cashiers. I'm not kidding, this place is so quiet. There's another grocery store that I recall visiting when I was a kid. It's still there, looks exactly the same, and that's been 50-55 years! It looks exactly the same.  I'm looking forward to shopping there too. They have a small food bar with meats, vegetables, and desserts that they offer between 11:00 and 2:00, and it's really nice. Many locals visit there every day for a "Special" to go, and yes, it's $5.99, and could feed two people.

    Six more nights. I'm not sure if I can stand it. I want the week to fly by. I want to get it over with. I'm not looking forward to driving the big truck, but I have driven one about 10 times in the past. I'll be OK. I'm not looking forward to all the hauling and unloading, but Laura is doing most of that. The big stuff comes on Sunday, and that's being done by my son Jonathan - Reuben's best friend. That is a HUGE blessing!! There's just no way we could have done that ourselves. He's bringing the couch, bookshelves, washer, dryer, cabinets, dresser, treadmill, boxing bag, and a few smaller things.

    One trip with his 15-foot truck should do it. One trip with our 10' UHaul and maybe 3 trips with the car. I hope I've calculated it correctly. I just changed my address on Amazon, too. From this point forward, all purchases will be directed to the new house. God is so good!! He is just so wonderful. 

Photo Credit: Me, (not taking the little saw) 

We Own Horses -- Again.

     Just like the move, I hope that this horse, the one I now own, is my last horse. I hope this is my last move. I hope this is my last job. I hope the Rapture comes, but yes, if it doesn't, I still hope this is my last horse! One of the nicest things about being able to say I'm a horse owner again, is that I really like the horse I bought. I don't think of her as a flip-horse, one I can buy, work, and sell for more money. I see her as my new friend. I hope she'll agree; and think I'm pretty cool too. 

    Jace is what I'm calling her. She's a sorrel and white Paint mare, and is probably in her mid-teens. We'll have to take her home to examine her mouth and teeth before we can be certain about her age. She's about 14.2 or 14.3HH tall, which is a good size, and she's pregnant. She'll foal sometime in the spring to early summer of 2026, and that baby will stay with us too. We're not selling it. Whether it's a boy or a girl, the baby's name is Harper. (Laura named it)

    Harper was going to be the name of Laura's new horse, a full-blooded Arabian mare whom we picked up at the same kill pen where Jace was. They were housed and/or brought in simultaneously. When I saw Jace, I wasn't immediately smitten. She was pretty, she was nice, she was dainty, and she was a good-looking horse, but I didn't say "Oh, wow!" We did that when we saw Laura's mare. You can't help yourself. The instant you see her, your mouth drops and your eyes bug out. Jace has a really kind eye, and she'll make an amazing horse. We're hoping the same is true with the Arabian mare.

    I don't know what Laura's going to call her. It was Harper, but that was before she thought harder about it. She wants to give her a name that she feels will live up to the grace and beauty of the animal. You'll see the pictures -- I'll post one here, and you can get an idea. But when we get her home and dress her up a little, she will shine! Bay Arabian mares can be so pretty in and of themselves with their high-held tails and dished faces; this one has the long tail and thick mane as well. She holds her head high and prances even when being ridden. She, too, is around 14.2 or 14.3HH, so she's a bit taller for her breed.

    I was gobsmacked that no one had paid her bail. She was only $875. No one was stepping up, and we couldn't figure that one out. Laura said, "OK, there has to be something really wrong with her," and we looked. Her knees are fine, her back is straight; she isn't injured, lazy, or dragging a foot. She's truly a perfect find; so why wasn't anyone jumping at the chance? We have no idea. When we realized that she was going to be shipped out today (11/12) if her bail wasn't paid, Laura gave me that look -- it's a familiar one. I'm not gonna lie and pretend I didn't know exactly what she wanted.

    Paying for the mare meant we'd have to sacrifice a couple of other smaller plans for the house, but if Laura is willing to put up the fence for the horse herself, that alone would save $1000, and that's the price of the horse and the transport to the QT. She sold a few things on Marketplace to cover the horse's transport to our house, and now all we have to do is hope I get paid a little extra between now and then to cover the board for both horses while they're up in Kansas waiting to come to our place. (It happened. I made Employee of the Month, and believe it or not, there was a little bonus that goes with that honor!) Jesus is just toooooo good to us.

    We own horses again! I gave up Ava in 2021. I think I can't remember. She was my last horse. She was a Foxtrotter. I think Laura's last horse was a Thoroughbred she could barely scale to get up on top of, and when she did, the thing tried to run her into things. No more nonsense! We're settling for two good broke and rideable horses, and a little newborn baby that I'm more than sure will come out spotted, but you never know. At least we know these horses will be spoiled completely rotten, and having them at our place means no one can judge us.

    If you don't know what I mean by that last statement, you haven't been around horse people. I like to say the best thing about horse people is their dogs! I mean that. Horse people can be so rude; we simply don't want anything to do with most of them anymore. At our place, it is OUR place. We don't have to wait to ride in the arena. We don't have to put up with barn drama. No one will steal our feed, our tack, or take our spot at the wash rack. No one will be there to tell us how we ride, or that our farrier doesn't know what he's doing. I could go on, but I've decided to smile, inhale, exhale, and thank God for our new place—and the horses. 

    Laura will be whole again. I know it.

Laura's mare: (not Laura on her, that's her at Peabody Kill Pen in Kansas)  

Murder is Real.

     I'm an author who writes about various topics, which always include romance, mystery, murder, crime, cover-ups, and more. I know where the lines are, and though I use a broad stroke with a fictional flair to it, I know the difference between actual violence and using words to describe a scene or scenario in one of my novels. I am forever grateful for the Second Amendment and the protective measures we have in our country to assist in deterring violent crimes; I believe in the right to self-defense.

    Why am I writing about this? Why am I suddenly sounding all serious and even a little macabre at the moment? Well, there's an answer. I'll tell you what I found out today, and you'll have to agree that I should at least address it, because I am now aware of it, and it did actually happen in real life to someone I know - two people, actually.  One of the people was someone I talked to on a weekly basis, though we never met. The other was my student in 2005, and not just my student, he was my favorite student. I had to call him that when we met periodically, for years. He would call me "Dr. Stringfellow," and I would respond with "Yes, (insert name), my all-time favorite student". That's just how it was.

    When my friend Randall Goya died in 2016 at the hand of a homeless man he had given refuge to, I was stunned. I was shocked beyond words when I found out who it was that killed someone who had only been good. Randall was my dog's webmaster and had been for over a decade. He called me one day out of the blue, asking if he could create and run Faith the Dog's website. He designed it, modified it, ran it, and maintained it. I told him he could monetize it if he felt he needed to, but he never did. He kept it simple and gave Faith all the love he could through his digital wisdom and extreme creativity.  He will be missed for many more years to come.

    Today, completely by accident, I found out that my favorite student, someone I hadn't heard from in a few years, had been murdered about a week or so after he last spoke to me. You don't think at the time, something like that happens, that you're never going to speak to them again. I just assumed he had gotten on with his work, his life, his friends, and that he had just simply fallen out of touch. That's not the case; it was murder. He was taken from us. He was murdered by a brutal, vicious, hateful man who had been let out of prison for virtually the same crime! The system failed again.  You don't have to guess what side of the aisle I lean to when it comes to keeping violent people locked up for life.

    I watched a show online about a gay man being murdered for no reason other than the fact that he was gay - how stupid is that? Well, it got me thinking about my student because he had a few "bad dates" and he had told me about them when we last spoke. Again, I assumed he was just busy with his life, but it turns out that one of the people he met on a dating app did, in fact, murder him, and even tried to cover up the evidence by setting my student's apartment on fire with his body in it. Not only would he have succeeded in destroying the apartment rented by my friend, but there were others living in units above and beside the one he set ablaze!

    I was truly hurt when I did a simple Google search to find my friend and realized he hadn't called or texted because he had been murdered. I read all I could about it, and found that the police had caught his killer pretty quickly after the event. That made me feel good - and the fact that his trial was fast and decisive also made me happy. The man literally said he killed my friend, my all-time favorite student, because "I do what I want to do", and then said "He asked too many questions", as if when they met on the dating app, all my friend was supposed to do was have fun and shut up; no questions! 

    Murder is a dirty thing; a terrible, horrible thing that ruins lives and forever changes nearly everyone touched by the callous act. I write about it, but I never really go too deeply into the effects and the affects it will have on the people who loved or knew the victim of the act. I think I'll do that in an upcoming book, and in that book, I'll add the two stories of my friends to make a point about how even outsiders can mourn for people who aren't too close, but close enough to know, love, and appreciate.  We just never know, do we? We just have no idea what can happen in a split second. 

    At first, I was upset with myself for not checking in on my student more often, but he was a grown man by then. He wasn't the 14-year-old kid I knew, who, yes, asked a lot of questions, but loved to smile, dance, surprise, and entertain me and the entire class. When he was given a good grade, he had to take a bow, and we loved it. Drama was in his blood, but sadly, the school didn't have a troupe! He would have been the star if it did. After sharing the news of his passing with a few people I know, I asked them if they had also not heard from someone in a while, and if maybe they wanted to check in on those who hadn't written or called.  Maybe it's something we need to do, but when do we know when it's time to do that if we're not really close? 

    Please know that when an author or actor is involved in sharing a story about murder, crime, or violence, that it is make-believe. It's not real. But when true crime happens, or real people are hurt, it's time to listen, time to open one's heart, and be a friend when they really need one.  The 3rd week of April used to be the week reserved to reflect on and remember the victims of violence in our country; however, September 25th is the day of remembrance for those who were murdered.  I try to remember to pray for and think about those who have been affected - and now I have more names to add to my prayers, not for him, but for those he loved and left.

    (I don't want to say my student's name. He was a rather private man.) 

Photo Credit:  Pinterest.com 

Starting to Take Real Shape.

     The whole move is starting to take real shape. I had to wait to be paid before I began buying what I needed, or paying those who were doing what they would need to do in order to make the move happen. You just don't realize how many steps and moves it takes. The thing has a lot of moving parts. Every last one of them has its own parts, starting times, and limits. I've been in anticipation mode for a while now, and it's starting to ease up just enough to feel good about the event! I'm moving!

    Laura and I have lived in the apartment complex we currently reside in since 2016 (early). Before that, we were in a house that got sold out from under us. Before that, we were in Indiana, and I can't tell you how many times we moved because someone didn't have the right to sell us something, or they overbooked, and we were the last ones to get the memo! We have had it pretty hard when it comes to living arrangements. We'll just say that. 

    The house we lived in from late 2014 to early 2016 was a little two-bedroom, one-bathroom, but it was cute, and we could afford it. That is, until houses in that area were being bought by a really greedy landlord who wanted to own literally every house on the block so he could run it. We were outbid, and even if we hadn't been, he's the type to have burned our house down to get us out. We could see the writing on the wall and moved to the apartments. We stayed in the same upstairs unit for about nine years before moving to the three-bedroom house we are in now, which is owned by the brother of the man who owns the complex. We're still considered a part of that complex.

    Well, as God would have it, since I don't believe in luck, we are now able to live in our own place! We thought we had it sewn up in Indy, but it didn't happen. It is happening now, and from the hoops we've jumped through recently, we've learned that no matter where you are, you will face issues and challenges when buying a home. It's just that way. I had to pay for the main inspection and a pest inspection. We had to negotiate with what was found in those two inspections. The sellers agreed to fix everything - so there you go! One major step forward.

    Yesterday, I bought the fridge; it will be delivered the day we move in. Today, I paid for the fence materials, and I'll pay the man the other half when he sets it up. It's working out!  We bought the bug bombs and cleared out the cabinets at our old place of things we don't need. I think we've taken 15 boxes to Goodwill, and that's not an exaggeration. I don't want to take anything over to the new place if we haven't seen or used it the entire time we've lived in this house. If someone else can use it, let them. I cleaned out the pantry as well - we could have used the food, but I'd rather not take it if I don't need to.

    We've got just about everything in a box that can go into one. When the day comes to load the truck, we'll do that, and if we have more to box afterwards, we'll find a way to make it happen. We have one day to move our smaller items, and then another day for the larger ones; one trip should suffice for each.  I think I could go into moving planning like some people go into wedding planning - but I wouldn't be any good at it, because it would have to be my way or no way -- I'm rather rude and nasty in that respect.

    From the moment you decide to buy a house to the moment you kick your feet up after the move, there are a million things that do happen, could happen, might happen, definitely going to happen, and so forth -- and the cost is unexpected from time to time. We're moving in and paying escrow, inspection, last month's rent, and the cost of the move. We have a fence to install, appliances to purchase, and a thousand pages of contract to sign and amend - over and over again. It's been a mess, but a good one. The sellers were unaware that they owned 14 acres. They thought it was 7, and that definitely caused an issue.

    We have 12 days to go — just 12 more days — and we can start loading the first truck with 85% of all we own. We'll drop it off, bomb the place, unload, put things away, rest, and do the big stuff 2 days later. After that, we breathe a little. We'll clean the old house to a certain extent, but with the hefty deposit I left, I'm not planning to make too much of it. They can clean it. I won't feel bad.  I was never going to see the deposit anyway; I may as well get my money out of it.

    A new chapter, a new beginning, and one that we get to write instead of having to obey all the rules that someone else wrote. Yes, owning your own home can be expensive. It is. I get that, but it can be so rewarding too.  We can paint if we want to, pull down the wallpaper, replace carpet, flooring, cabinets, and/or whatever we think needs to be replaced, repaired, or redone. It's going to take a while to do it, but it will be so pretty someday.

Photo Credit: Boston Magazine