Sunday, October 12, 2008

You Gotta Go to a Gay Bar to See Straight!




The Hi-Lo Club in Oklahoma City on the Classen Circle.

OK, so no, I never really knew the Hi-Lo was considered a Gay bar. OK, it's a Gay bar, but I've gone there, my straight (married) friends go there, and my best friend who I've been hanging out with for more than 30 years (God, we're old) goes there. I think the crowd last night was just either pissed that OU lost, or excited that OSU won - and hey, the Cowboys beat Missouri, that's big. They should have been excited, but no, I didn't think it was any TYPE of a bar.

When I went in 1982 I remember thinking "You know, there's a lot of men in this bar and not one of them is really interested in me, but damn, he has great hair!" Yes, I thought that in the 80's, but not now. Now I think the Hi-Lo enjoys bragging on their better drinks (they still put a lot of alcohol in them) and they brag on their multi-faceted jukebox that has a lot of cool buttons and great big touch screen - and they brag about their long-standing Asteroids game that still stands in the same corner it stood in back in 1982! I would NOT be surprised to find Manuel's name and game having the top rank in scoring still - a record that I don't think CAN be beaten by human hands.

Last night was a weird one for sure, yes, it was just ODD. First I'm dealing with the loss of the OU/Texas shootout, then my kid Laura Cakes has to be driven home, which is in Stillwater - enemy territory from the north. I do that - wearing my Boomer Sooner Crimson! YES I did! Then I drove with Jeanie to take her kid "Little Kristen" to a haunted house downtown, which never happens, but we did it anyway and nearly ran over a couple too busy kissing to pay attention to little things like red-lights and crosswalks...10 points a piece I say! We're going home and get a text from her other kid Julie, the married one(Tony), wanting us to come to a Gay bar....yeah well, why not!

OK so it had been more than 25 years but it was exactly the same. You could have changed our hair and given us stretch pants, but we would have been in the same place at the same time, and if you want a really good quantum leap experience, go to Hi Lo and hug Sparky! Yes, his name is Sparky, his parents were THAT way! I bought a couple of drinks, but this time I had a couple of them bought for me - by TEXANS! It all started when we began shouting over the jukebox to discuss the officials and their mistakes - don't get me wrong, these Texans accepted the burden of their win! They were just appreciative of my understanding I guess - we all celebrated and agreed to another match up. This Red River Rivalry goes long, hard, and deep, it's on both sides and it's wonderful - the best thing is, there's ALWAYS next year! The year comes that they don't match up OU/Texas on the schedule there's going be be a bunch of heads rolling - we want this match up, we need this venting, and we're going to have it! Dallas is fair game in October! Half the city wears Crimson and half of it wears Burnt Orange. Beer seems to be a common denominator.

One of the best things about the Hi-Lo is you can't fit too many in it - but it's always hopping, always diving, always singing, and always playing - so go - if you can figure out how to get there from the Classen Circle - and (this is very important) when you're drunk and you're trying to leave and not be caught by the cops who sit outside - smile and remember to never never turn left at the first opportunity - it's a one-way!

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