Monday, October 8, 2007

Green Tea 3X a day - Liquified.

OH...this is too cool. The greatest thing just happened to me this week, and if I don't tell you I'll be the sorriest person because it can only benefit you. I can't stop helping you, I love you! OK...I was in the organic store, that's what my kids call it. I call it the really cool store where I get my legal drugs, but they insist on being precise. I was in the section of the store where all the vitamins and outrageously interesting herbs are stocked. Some of the names of these herbs makes me think I'm living in Salem during the witch-hunts! I really get a bang out of reading off what some of these potions can do for a woman...but I digress (I buy some also, but I digress!) There I was staring at a little brown bottle with a dropper on the topper. The bottle read "Green Tea Extract" and it was pure liquid...what, you thought tea was something else? I immediately pulled it off the shelf and found myself a guru to explain the contents. By contents I really mean benefits.

The guru on aisle 6 told me that the green tea extract, at that potency that I was holding, now cuddling in my hand, would be equivalent to drinking 12 cups of tea if I only drank 1 dropper full of the elixir with a shot of water. One dropper, one shot, 12 cups. (That's how Jesus fed the 5,000 I bet!) OK, back to the story. The guru told me that drinking the green tea extract 3 times a day with no more than a shot of water, my body would have the benefits of having 36 cups of tea (the juice part anyway) and there would be NO, count them, NO side effects. I couldn't believe it. If I drank 36 cups of tea I would be side-lined in the toilet for hours a day. No side effects, no spinning head, no vomiting, no irritable stomach, no hot flashes, no heart jumps - are you serious? What about weight loss? That was my first inclination for going into the store and seeking out something easier, simple, and altogether potent - I want the belly to disappear!!! Can it do that? I stared at the woman without even scaring her and that can't be easily understood because by this time I was holding her hand in my free hand and I was so close to her face as if what we were discussing was some magic trade secret - she smiled. (See also stepped back a foot)She told me in a word "Yes."

Yes! I would be drinking, or actually NOT drinking, the 36 cups of tea. The effects would be remarkable, the stress levels that are reduced through green tea would be exaggerated to the point of utter peace - tranquility in a bottle - that's awesome! $10? I had to sit down on that thought - $10 and I was going to be at complete peace. There had to be a catch. Of course, drinking green tea is also great because it helps to combat cancers, lowers your blood pressure, and it even helps to regulate your heart rate. For 10 bucks? All that? There was a catch! I had to pay the $10 up front before taking the tea home with me. Hahaha...so I did.

I wanted to test it out because I wasn't about to blog or share this sensational product if it wasn't real or if it didn't work - HELLOOOOOO, it works. Remember those lucid and incredibly vivid dreams I was having about a certain Italian man resembling a gorgeous turtle, who I often warble about - how he pops in and out of my head and bed all night, just smiling and being the creatively magnificent man that I personally believe him to be? Well, even he has stepped it up a bit in my dreaming - he's younger, he's more fluid, he's more agile, and that - well, that makes me smile! To credit the tea completely may be over stepping it - but I will say that the work outs have been easier, the pain in my bum from the stretching and the new Yoga book aren't as bad, and the pants I bought to one day wear are ON MY BODY! I won't over do the tea, I promise. Gary couldn't take it! Hahaha, Oh, I am sooo naughty sometimes - but happy, yes, I'm smiling!

Oh, look at the time, gotta go - it's Tea Time!

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